Some group of people have benefited from modern communications technology but some people do not have benefit at all. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many individuals say that they exclusively get a plus side from
intertechnology
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Intertechnology
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which is part of state-of-the-art
technology
.
However
, some humans say that there is no benefit from that . It seems to me that I totally concur
on
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with
show examples
this
statement because almost everything includes its minuses and as well as pluses . On the right hand , useful changes are given to humanity
by
Change preposition
through
show examples
communication
technology
. In our era,
people
do not have to stand in phone booths or go to friends' houses to socialize with them . Take
for example
people
who lived
seventies
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the seventies
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,
eighties
Correct word choice
and eighties
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.
Although
, in these times , their
technology
was slightly developed it is different from ours . Now there is a big difference between them .
For example
, we can communicate with our relatives or mates with help of mobile phones without leaving home .The most amazing thing
Add a missing verb
is
show examples
that they include some features which give us a chance
seeing
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to see
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the face of the caller .
Hence
, we will not worry about the person and waste their extra time .
On the other hand
, as
technology
develops,
so
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
humans
Add a missing verb
are
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busy. Several groups of individuals prefer
sedentary
Correct article usage
a sedentary
show examples
lifestyle .
Therefore
, they could be found to have different diseases .
For instance
, heart disease . Almost 47 % of
people
who
as
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apply
show examples
a
secretary
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secretaries
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suffer from
this
sort of illness because they work sitting in one place answering calls and looking at the computer making their presentations .
Consequently
, because of
this
they only get harm. In conclusion, even though telecommunication has its advantages which provide many opportunities it has drawbacks which destroy
Change noun form
people's
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people'
Correct your spelling
people's
show examples
lives.
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • modern communications technology
  • global connectivity
  • remote work
  • digital divide
  • e-commerce
  • socioeconomic status
  • geography
  • impersonal
  • face-to-face communication
  • over-reliance
  • cyberbullying
  • misinformation
  • privacy concerns
  • tech-savvy
  • health implications
  • eye strain
What to do next:
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