IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some people think painting and drawing are as important as other subjects, they should be compulsory in the high school education. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #subjects #school #education
In recent days, technology has developed a lot, and because of
this
, people have not paid attention to
art
. And
also
 in schools, high
school
 students do not have drawing lessons. Personally, I think every lesson is important. In my opinion,there are great benefits to learning
art
 because children can develop creativity and they can learn to express themselves through
art
.
Also
,
art
 education helps teenagers to develop comprehensively and be able to take care of their mental health.
For example
, by doing
art
,
that is
, drawing or listening to music, a person can relax. Drawing a person displays his thoughts, feelings and emotions. And it helps a person to keep his nerves. Another big plus is that high
school
 students studying
art
 can develop their aesthetic skills and their creativity.It always benefits them.
For example
, a pupil or student with creative skills can build a good career. For their work, and creativity can get a very good income . They can provide for themselves. But there are a few downsides.
This
 is something that not every student can be interested in drawing at
school
. But the teacher is forced to draw and complete assignments.
This
 will take the student's time. In conclusion, it would be a big mistake if we underestimate the role of arts in the
school
 curriculum. Learning arts not only helps teenagers to take care of their mental health but
also
 improves their creative thinking.
Submitted by bekzodeshonjonovv on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: