Some people think painting and drawing are as important as other subjects, they should be compulsory in the high school education. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #subjects #school #education

In recent days, technology has developed a lot, and because of

this

, people have not paid attention to

art

. And

also

in schools, high

school

students do not have drawing lessons. Personally, I think every lesson is important. In my opinion,there are great benefits to learning

art

because children can develop creativity and they can learn to express themselves through

art

Also

art

education helps teenagers to develop comprehensively and be able to take care of their mental health.

For example

, by doing

art

that is

, drawing or listening to music, a person can relax. Drawing a person displays his thoughts, feelings and emotions. And it helps a person to keep his nerves. Another big plus is that high

school

students studying

art

can develop their aesthetic skills and their creativity.It always benefits them.

For example

, a pupil or student with creative skills can build a good career. For their work, and creativity can get a very good income . They can provide for themselves. But there are a few downsides.

This

is something that not every student can be interested in drawing at

school

. But the teacher is forced to draw and complete assignments.

This

will take the student's time. In conclusion, it would be a big mistake if we underestimate the role of arts in the

school

curriculum. Learning arts not only helps teenagers to take care of their mental health but

also

improves their creative thinking.

Submitted by bekzodeshonjonovv on Fri Nov 11 2022

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
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Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

239 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think painting and drawing are as important as other subjects, they should be compulsory in the high school education. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people believe that the government should invest more in public transportation to reduce traffic congestion. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

Nowadays the way people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In whats has technology affected the types of relationships people make, has this become a positive or negative development ?

Some people think that zoos are cruel and should be closed down. Others, however, believe that zoos can be useful in protecting wild animals.

Some schools are very strict about their school uniforms and the appearance of their pupils, while other schools have a very relaxed dress code. What are the advantages and disadvantages of children of having a school uniform?

Environmental damage is a problem in most countries. What is the cause of this damage? What should be done about this problem?