IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

It is argued that parents of children who break the law should be punished as they are responsible for their children's actions. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#parents #children #law #actions
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is an undeniable fact that " laws are made to maintain the decorum of a nation ." It is a debatable issue that well-being must be penalised if their offspring break the law since they are responsible for what their department
do
Change the verb form
does
show examples
. I partly accord with
this
Linking Words
 statement. In
this
Linking Words
 requisition, I will discuss my views from multiple angles before deriving a meaningful conclusion. To commence with , there are myriad reasons why
parents
Use synonyms
 are punished in place of their children . The most pertinent one is that scholars will not make
aberration
Fix the agreement mistake
aberrations
show examples
 when they will see guardians punished. To explicate,when parish will see that their
parents
Use synonyms
 are getting hurt because of their malpractices, they will certainly not repeat their misstep as they are keenly attached to their
parents
Use synonyms
 . Ergo , it aids in the development of learners. Another worth mentioning merit is that
parents
Use synonyms
 do not scold their precinct when they are young . Categorically discussing, as wellbeings are busy in their hectic schedule they hardly have time to show a correct path to their offspring since they are busy making money . Resultantly , guardians must be penalised in place of
parish
Add an article
the parish
show examples
 . On the paradoxical side, there are various demerits when
parents
Use synonyms
 are punished . The most prominent one in
this
Linking Words
 regard is that well-being does not say their offspring to make fault. To elaborate, it is true that guardians are responsible for making a bright future for their precinct and they do their best to fulfil the desire of their children.
Consequently
Linking Words
,
parents
Use synonyms
 are not responsible for the malpractices their offspring do . To recapitulate, after sifting through both views thoroughly it can be stated that
parents
Use synonyms
 are
also
Linking Words
 responsible for the aberration their scion
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
 considerably.
Moreover
Linking Words
 , punishment is somehow essential and aids in the development of heir .
Submitted by nazarov.orif26 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: