Some people think the government should pay for health care and education, but there is no agreement about whether it is the government’s responsibility. What is your opinion?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There are
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
controversial perspectives heating up a debate over the fact that whether the
authority
Fix the agreement mistake
authorities
show examples
should make an investment in medical care and the
education
Use synonyms
system
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
some hold a strong view that the state ought to bear the financial burden of the
healthcare
Use synonyms
system
Use synonyms
and schooling, the opposite makes a statement that allocating money to
healthcare
Use synonyms
and
education
Use synonyms
is not the accountability of the government. In my opinion, I would contend that the governors had better cover the cost of the medical
system
Use synonyms
and
people
Use synonyms
’s learning journey but they shouldn’t fully pour money into both mentioned factors. Without a shadow of a doubt, providing financial support for
healthcare
Use synonyms
and
education
Use synonyms
is necessary for the authority. The explanation for
this
Linking Words
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
could be that it improves the quality of professional
labor
Change the spelling
labour
show examples
and
physical
Correct article usage
the physical
show examples
health of the
people
Use synonyms
to prosper the country’s economy.
For example
Linking Words
, developed countries
such
Linking Words
as Germany and the
Netherland
Fix the agreement mistake
Netherlands
show examples
waive tuition fees or
provided
Wrong verb form
provide
show examples
scholarships and
supplied
Wrong verb form
supply
show examples
health insurance to their
people
Use synonyms
,
making
Verb problem
giving
show examples
leading countries
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
economic strength.
Thus
Linking Words
, cashing in the above two important
Use synonyms
system
Change to a plural noun
systems
show examples
is taken into consideration which the government ought to do.
While
Linking Words
the importance of
financially
Change the word
financial
show examples
support for schooling and
healthcare
Use synonyms
of the governor is widely acknowledged, they shouldn’t thoroughly make a payment for two facets. Given the fact that the national coffer does not allow it
as
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
there are many alternative aspects to invest in.And
people
Use synonyms
had better pay because by doing
this
Linking Words
, they will have more responsibility and raise awareness about protecting
health
Add an article
the health
show examples
and ensuring
quality
Add an article
the quality
show examples
of learning.
Therefore
Linking Words
, if the government pays all but
people
Use synonyms
involved in social evils or those who drop out of school
also
Linking Words
benefit from it, causing inequality for responsible citizens.
Hence
Linking Words
, the authority ought not to fund In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
financial
supports
Fix the agreement mistake
support
show examples
for the
education
Use synonyms
system
Use synonyms
and the
healthcare
Use synonyms
system
Use synonyms
is
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
necessity
Replace the word
necessary
show examples
for the country’s economic development,
this
Linking Words
cost shouldn’t
be suffer
Change the verb form
suffer
show examples
from
government’s
Correct article usage
the government’s
show examples
budget.
Submitted by hominhtrang995 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Focus on clearly organizing your ideas with clear paragraphing, including distinct introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and the supporting sentences are directly related to it.
task achievement
Ensure your essay fully responds to all parts of the task, including supporting your opinion with clear arguments and examples.
task achievement
Use a variety of sentence structures and vocabulary to demonstrate language proficiency.
general
Revise your essay to check for any grammatical errors or typo mistakes for a polished final version.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • fundamental human rights
  • boosts the country's economy
  • productivity
  • public funding
  • equality and accessibility
  • socio-economic status
  • privatized
  • disparities
  • prioritize
  • people's well-being
  • inefficiencies
  • bureaucratic challenges
  • mixed approach
  • optimize
  • quality
  • availability
What to do next:
Look at other essays: