IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

We cannot help everyone in the world that needs help, so we should only be concerned with our own communities and countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#world #communities #countries
It is generally agreed that we cannot support everyone who needs help in the world. Somebody believes that we should focus on problems in our own communities and
countries
 and not assist
people
 in other nations. I completely disagree with
this
 view because I assume that we should try to help as many
people
 as possible.
To begin
 with, aiding less developed states to help
people
 broaden their horizons. We can acquire useful knowledge
such
 as about the society, education, and culture of those
countries
, which makes our own nation progress quickly and improve
people
’s living standards, or we get respect and love from everyone.
For instance
, Quang Linh gives assistance to Angolan
people
 to build houses, instructs them to grow vegetables and creates opportunities for poor students to go to school. As a consequence, he masters the Angolan language, gains an understanding of great experiences in life, extremely succeeds in Angola and gets esteem from the
people
 there.
On the other hand
, the way I see it, we have an obligation to help those who live beyond our national borders. In some
countries
, the problems that
people
 face are much more serious than those in our own communities, and it is often even easier to help.
This
 can be seen when epidemics broke out in African nations, governments and individuals in richer
countries
 can prevent that by paying for vaccines and providing modern medical types of equipment, so the epidemic cannot spread to other areas and limit the number of deaths. In conclusion, helping everyone in the world is impossible, but in my opinion, if we help out
people
 and
countries
 internationally, we will develop more perfectly.
Submitted by josduynhat on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • global interconnectivity
  • international cooperation
  • ethics
  • moral obligation
  • geographical borders
  • diplomatic relations
  • economic stability
  • global security
  • resource allocation
  • expertise
  • international aid
  • dependency and development
  • sustainable solutions
  • local and global initiatives
  • community resilience
What to do next:
Look at other essays: