We live in cities or towns which have museums displaying historical and cultural importance, but people do not visit them. What are the reasons?

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Some individuals claim that we are living in a world
that
Correct word choice
where

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

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many young people are neglecting
museums
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

exhibiting historical and cultural importance.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

phenomenon results from the lack of
citizen’s
Change noun form
citizen

It seems that this noun form may be incorrect.

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excitement and
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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awareness of each person in maintaining the national cultural identity. After consideration,
i
Change the capitalization
I

The pronoun I should always be capitalized.

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assume that it can be mitigated by inserting more interactive activities and advancing superior facilities in
museums
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. A primary reason why people ignore local
museums
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is the poor insightful concept.
In other words
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, they only display permanent
artifacts
Change the spelling
artefacts

The spelling of artifacts is a non-British variant. For consistency, consider replacing it with the British English spelling.

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, with poor light and high
temperature
Fix the agreement mistake
temperatures

It seems that temperature may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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inside. That’s why some
museums
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

appear to be not aesthetically pleasing and many visitors, including non-locals, find it predictable as the theme is repetitive. Another reason for
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

issue is because of degraded facilities and poor-quality services. It implies that the money the tourists spend time on
museums
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is not
Correct pronoun usage
itworthy

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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worthy
Replace the word
worth

The word worthy doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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, they feel
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

is a predictable experience and lost interest
with
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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things that they have already known The consequences
for
Change preposition
of

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

problem are serious. Resultantly, inserting more interactive activities is a necessary feature of preserving historical and cultural values. Having various activities provides the visitors
many
Replace the quantifier
much

It appears that the quantifier many does not fit with the uncountable noun knowledge. Consider changing it.

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knowledge,
they
Correct word choice
and they

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

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can gain
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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insight
by
Change preposition
through

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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experience. There should be a
tour-guide
Correct your spelling
tour guide

The word tour-guide doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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to impart while visiting so the tourists can dig deeper
about
Change preposition
into

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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the history and culture more than just
look
Change the verb form
looking

The verb look may be in the wrong form after the preposition than. Consider changing it to the gerund form.

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through the
artifacts
Change the spelling
artefacts

The spelling of artifacts is a non-British variant. For consistency, consider replacing it with the British English spelling.

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.
In addition
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the government should upgrade quality facilities for the
museums
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

to ensure the greatest experience for people. Without
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

solution, there will not be anyone
visit
Wrong verb form
visiting

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb visit. Consider changing it.

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local
museums
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

in the future, and the cultural identity will gradually disappear.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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