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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Most people have forgotten the meaning behind traditional festivals as Tet holiday; during festival periods, people nowadays only want to enjoy themselves. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #festivals #tet #holiday #periods
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Computer
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Science
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 can help me upgrade my toolbox for
video
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 production and game production. I have been working in the entertainment business for almost six years. From practical use to teaching students. Gradually I think a master's degree in Fine Art is not enough. In the past, film
editors
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 and
video
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editors
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 worked on equipment
such
Linking Words
 as Moviola and
video
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 tape recorder systems to edit films and videotape together. Even though their jobs are not that hard and can be learned very quickly, there is a technical barrier lays between
editors
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 and laymen. Unfortunately, the development of
computer
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 technology and decreasing price of
computer
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 hardware destroy the barrier that lies between
editors
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 and the general public, anyone can become a
video
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 editor in less than a month. All they need to do is get a
computer
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 and study free tutorials or charged courses through the Internet. As an editor, I still have my advantages over those amateurs, but not that much. It’s only a matter of time before the advantages
Add a missing verb
are gone
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gone
Wrong verb form
go
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 completely. For me, the
next
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 thing I need to do is find something that could help me to build up the barriers again, and
computer
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science
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 is one of the
last
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 straws in
a
Correct article usage
apply
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negligible quantity that could put me out
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this
Change preposition
of this
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 difficult situation. With the help of
computer
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science
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, I could shift from a postproduction software user to a postproduction software developer. I could understand the operation mechanism behind all these editing processes and animation creation, which could help me to create motion graphics, 2D 3D animation, visual effects or even
video
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 games from a whole different level. The film is
the
Correct article usage
a
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 combination of art and
science
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, to fulfil any director’s fantasy and astonish the audience,
computer
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science
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 is something that can be counted on. I have been exploring the aesthetic part of creating motion pictures, it’s time for me to dig deep into the technic aspects of it.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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