In the past, people used to travel abroad to look for many differences from their home country. Nowadays, cities throughout the world are becoming more and more similar. What are the reasons? Is this a positive or negative development?

#people #travel #differences #home #country #cities #world #development

Undoubtedly, cities around the world have been suffering influences from outside, and as

result

Correct article usage

a result

show examples

places

became

Wrong verb form

have become

show examples

too similar to each other and lost their identity.

Besides

, globalism is opening the market and many

countries

are

making

Verb problem

doing

show examples

business with each other, and the population are accessing imported

products

easiest.

Firstly

, the main reason is globalization which provides exchanges between people from many

places

For instance

, I've been to South Africa and there I had wonderful experiences

such

as visiting a famous vinery in the mountain around, and I had a candle dinner with my wife in recognised restaurants. In fact, the point is, I felt as my

last

travel to Europe, where I visited similar

places

as I could enjoy in South Africa. To be honest, I'm not an expert and I'm bringing up a fact about those who immigrated to another land and took with them their unique style, and obviously, applied it there.

Secondly

, the open market

provides

Verb problem

allows

show examples

companies to export and import

products

from many

places

For example

, China has been

making

Verb problem

doing

show examples

business in many

countries

around the world and no matter what you buy, probably is written the phrase by China.

Besides

, another example is

products

by Apple CO,

according to

an article, only North Corea, Cuba, and other communist

countries

don't commercialize these

products

, and as

result

Correct article usage

a result

show examples

, around 90% of

countries

on the earth are using an iPhone, Macbook, and so

Rephrase

on.

show examples

In my opinion,

this

guarantees equality for humanity.

To conclude

, the open market is vital for the economy, and it can improve folks' development,

however

, authorities should work hard to boost the financial situation without losing their own style.

Submitted by murilo.siqueira2012 on Mon Nov 21 2022

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

274 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In the past, people used to travel abroad to look for many differences from their home country. Nowadays, cities throughout the world are becoming more and more similar. What are the reasons? Is this a positive or negative development?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

A person's worth nowadays seems to judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned value, such as honour, kindness, and trust no longer seem important. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say history is one of the most important school subject. Other people think that, in today’s world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some of the methods used in advertising are unethical and unacceptable in today’s society. To what extent do you agree with this view?

Car ownership has increased so rapidly over the past thirty years that many cities in the world are now one big traffic jam. How true do you think this statement is? What measures can governments take to discourage people from using cars?