In the past, people used to travel abroad to look for many differences from their home country. Nowadays, cities throughout the world are becoming more and more similar. What are the reasons? Is this a positive or negative development?

#people #travel #differences #home #country #cities #world #development

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Increasingly, globalization has been changing people’s lives and those who like to travel abroad to learn about cultures don’t need it anymore. Nowadays, an individual can discover culture curious only using a smartphone. I have my opinion and would like to discuss both sides in

this

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essay.

Firstly

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, a good reason for cities

Fix the infinitive

to looks

show examples

looks

Correct subject-verb agreement

look

show examples

like others is globalism, which

allowed

Wrong verb form

allows

show examples

people travel to outside of the home, only using technology devices.

For instance

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, for many years I’ve been studying English with a teacher from Canada,

however

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, she was born in India. So,

consequently

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, I’ve learned a lot about both cultures which I can apply to many learners daily.

For instance

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, an Indian person taught me wonderful habits from Canadians,

such

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as celebrating

Thanks Given

Correct your spelling

Thanksgiving

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among friends and families, and Brazilians don’t celebrate it.

This

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is the magic provided by globalization.

Secondly

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, still talking about globalism, many countries around the world where there is an open market have been improving their economies, and society has been increasing their incomers as well.

For instance

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, marketplaces

such

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as Amazon, and Mercado Libre and so, have been boosting the number of entrepreneurs worldwide, and most of them have been hiring more and more employees each year. To be honest, I’m not an expert in economics and politics,

moreover

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, poverty

Wrong verb form

has been

show examples

going on for fewer than decades

ago

Rephrase

apply

show examples

This

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is the reason why I support it, humanity must deserve the same opportunity, and

this

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provides equality. In conclusion, governments should intensify rules and maintain cities’ identity, and

besides

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, foments

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

open market investments for attracting more and more international business and money.

Submitted by murilo.siqueira2012 on Tue Nov 22 2022

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Task Achievement

Task Achievement score is moderate. The response addresses the prompt but lacks a clear development of ideas and examples. Make sure to fully address each aspect of the prompt in a clear and comprehensive manner.

Coherence and Cohesion

Coherence and Cohesion score is satisfactory. The logical structure of the essay is somewhat clear, with some portion of appropriate introduction and conclusion present. However, the essay needs better organization and linking of ideas to improve overall coherence and cohesion.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

267 words

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In the past, people used to travel abroad to look for many differences from their home country. Nowadays, cities throughout the world are becoming more and more similar. What are the reasons? Is this a positive or negative development?

Scientific research should be carried out and controlled by private companies rather than governments. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages? Write an essay with at least 250 words

some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

some people suggested that cars should be banned in the centrals of the large cities. Do you agree or disagree？

In many countries people have to pay for medical care, but some think that it should be a free service provided by the government. To what extend Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearances. Discuss both views and give your opinion.