In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of ageing populations.

#world #life #expectancy #individuals #society #measures #impact #populations

It is undeniable that prosperous countries are experiencing an increase in average lifespan, which may cause problems for each individual or society. Several correlated problems can be carefully discussed.

Firstly

, the ageing population puts a strain on

government’s

Correct article usage

the government’s

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finance. The elderly are unable to join in

workforce

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the workforce

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, which means the amount of money that government earn from tax reduces.

Beside

Replace the word

Besides

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, the government has to spend

budget

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the budget

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not only on

pension

Fix the agreement mistake

pensions

show examples

but

also

healthcare

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the healthcare

show examples

system and nursing homes for the aged.

Secondly

, in

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society, the increasing number of older

people

has contributed to the decreasing number of young

people

who play a significant role in

workforce

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the workforce

show examples

. The economy of a country might encounter a number of difficulties because of

working

Correct article usage

the working

show examples

population shortage. Take Japan as an example, the population of

working –age

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working–age

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teens and adults are shrinking.

This

means that there will be fewer

people

entering

working

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the working

show examples

force, so many firms in Japan have no choice but employing abroad

workers

who demand

for

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apply

show examples

higher pay.

Moreover

workers

are required to work overtime, which severely affects their health and reduces productivity as well. In order to address the aforementioned issues, several measures can be taken. The

first

measure would be to call for working

people

to save more for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

retirement. Saving a sufficient sum of money would ensure that the elderly have a better life without depending on

government’s

Correct article usage

the government’s

show examples

budget. Another action

should

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that should

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be taken is to raise the retirement age. Aged

workers

are encouraged to take part in

labour

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the labour

show examples

force to alleviate the pressure on young

workers

. In conclusion,

growing

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the growing

show examples

expectation

Fix the agreement mistake

expectations

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of life can lead to concerns which are

financial

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a financial

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burden on the government and lack of working labour and

this

issue can be dealt with money-saving

plan

Fix the agreement mistake

plans

show examples

and delay in retirement age.

Submitted by trminhchau27 on Thu Nov 24 2022

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

295 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

average life expectancy
developed world
increase
individuals
society
personal goals
ambitions
quality of life
leisure
recreation
healthcare costs
challenges
healthcare system
ageing population
shortage
available workers
economy
retirement planning
healthy lifestyles
investing
social support systems

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In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of ageing populations.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people prefer to live in a house, while others feel that there are more advantages to living in an apartment. Are there more advantages than disadvantages of living in a house compared with living in an apartment?

Many people around the world use social media everyday to keep in touch with other people and gets news events. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think studying in groups is better, while some think self study is better for school students. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

In some countries, the government promotes public transport as the primary means of transportation and discourages private vehicle ownership. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this situation

Young people who commit serious crimes, such as a robbery or a violent attack should be punished in the same way as adults. To what extent do you agree or disagree?