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Writing Samples
Band 8

some people believe that teenager are facing more problems in thier life than they did in the past and this is because parents are spending more time at work than at home. Do you agree or diagree?

#people #teenager #thier #life #parents #time #work #home #diagree
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It is said that adolescents are having more troubles in their life compared to the past, due to the lack of
parents
 caring. I entirely concur with
this
 statement based on forming bad habits and worsening mental conditions.
First
 and foremost, boyhood can learn bad behaviour easier. It is true that both
parents
 spend the majority of their time on work, and put less attention to their kids. During adolescence, the youth might have different problems,
such
 as a lack of self-confidence, and herd instinct to follow the trend among their classmates. Multiple pieces of research conducted that over 75% of young individuals have bad behaviours
such
 as smoking or drug abuse because of the lack of parenting. It reveals that with insufficient parenting, teens are unable to determine whether the behaviour is correct or not.
As a result
, youngsters might have a higher chance to create adverse habits which may hinder their personal development.
Furthermore
, boyhood has a higher chance of suffering from mental illnesses
such
 as depression. It is clear that children spend less time with their
parents
, and
parents
 are unable to have a deep conversation with their kids in order to understand their condition both mentally and physically.
For instance
, research from the University of Cambridge illustrates that less than 10% of
parents
 organize family time with their children, like going for a picnic or visiting the theme park. It depicts that children without support and care from their
parents
 might feel a sense of loneliness or sadness. With the rising of negative emotions, boyhood has a higher chance suffer from different mental illnesses, with depression or anxiety as the most common.
Consequently
, insufficient care from
parents
 may lead to imbalances in mental health conditions among the younger generation. In a nutshell, I strongly stand by
this
 statement, as insufficient parenting hampers the development of teens.
Submitted by clara on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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