Today, many parents force their children to study all kinds of courses in their early age. What are the reasons behind this? What effects do you think this practice would bring to the children?

In modern days, educational factors are important parts of most
children
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's
life
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lives
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. A number of parents want to their
children
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acquire more in all subjects at an early age. I will discuss in
this
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essay several reasons why it happens and how it can influence
children
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in upcoming paragraphs. On the one hand, there are some reasonable reasons why guardians want to their
children
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get high marks in all classes like math, science or even art at school.
This
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is because they believe that it is significant that their offspring should outperform more than others in order to
children
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attend some prestigious universities, which is one method that they can get a golden opportunity to work in giant companies like Apple or Samsung.
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, if their
children
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show genius or gifts in the curriculum, it is felicity to their parents. Meanwhile, it will be able to give disadvantages to both
children
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's life and our society. One thing is they might have a lot of stress and suffer from a lack of exercise
due to
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heavy studies and a sedentary lifestyle when their childhood.
For instance
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, when they are kindergarten or primary students, they go to institutes where they can learn major subjects, which as secondary courses like math or English .
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, they have to study for a long time until at night.
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, in Korea, the rate of suicide is getting higher than before more and more because when they get low scores on an exam, they feel frustrated easily.
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, parents want to lead to forward that their
children
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live
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to live
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quality
while
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studying in a well-known college and working in a conglomerate, but I believe that it can cause severe problems in our society
if
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at
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early
Correct article usage
an early
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age they study.

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language
Consider rephrasing 'want to their children acquire more' to 'want their children to acquire more'.
argument
When discussing negative effects on children, ensure to provide a clearer connection to the broader societal implications.
language
Make sure to clearly state your opinion in the conclusion and summarize the main points effectively to reinforce your argument.
structure
You provided a clear introduction and outlined the main points you intend to discuss.
support
Your essay includes relevant examples, particularly the reference to South Korea and its issues related to educational pressure.
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