IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Fast food is becoming one part of life everywhere:this has bad effect on our lifestyle and diet. To what extent agree or disagree.

People
Use synonyms
 have created several
aim
Change to a plural noun
aims
show examples
facilitate
Fix the infinitive
to facilitate
show examples
 for yourself lifestyle they use fast food a lot because they went they do not cook
Add an article
a meal
the meal
show examples
meal
Fix the agreement mistake
meals
show examples
 as well as do not spend a lot of time
use
Wrong verb form
using
show examples
 foodstuff it
is agree
Change the verb form
is agreed
show examples
 or
disagree
Replace the word
disagreement
show examples
 will
discussed
Add a missing verb
be discussed
show examples
 in the essay. The more active
people
Use synonyms
 are the greater their need for
Add an article
a meal
the meal
show examples
meal
Fix the agreement mistake
meals
show examples
. But it is not
they
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
Correct your spelling
must
show examples
mast
Correct your spelling
must
show examples
 eat foodstuff because many vitamins and kkal have not to feed.
Furthermore
Linking Words
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
many
illness
Change to a plural noun
illnesses
show examples
 because
of
Change preposition
by
show examples
 poor nutrition.
Thus
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 should eat feed when they are bored
form
Correct your spelling
from
show examples
 national food. But
Correct your spelling
usually
ussully
Correct your spelling
usually
 humans eat
Add an article
a snack
show examples
snack
Fix the agreement mistake
snacks
show examples
 when they go to work, school and other as they do not late to work.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
,Also
show examples
snack
Fix the agreement mistake
snacks
show examples
Correct your spelling
sell
selled
Correct your spelling
sold
show examples
 to young children in some
Correct your spelling
schools
school
schoolm
Correct your spelling
schools
for example
Linking Words
:my little sister every day get money by dad because she is hungry at
school
Add an article
the school
show examples
 shop. She
eat
Change the verb form
eats
show examples
hot
Add an article
a hot
show examples
 dog, hit launch and other. It is very
injury
Correct your spelling
injure
show examples
 her health so I try to prepare
launch
Correct article usage
a launch
show examples
 for him to take to school. In
summary
Add a comma
,summary
show examples
 it is not good
eating
Change the verb form
to eat
show examples
 semi-prepared food so humans must try
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
not
use
Fix the infinitive
to use
show examples
Add an article
a snack
show examples
snack
Fix the agreement mistake
snacks
show examples
.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
other
Change the wording
another hand
other hands
show examples
hand
Add a comma
,hand
show examples
 you do not waste time
to cook
Change the verb form
cooking
show examples
. If you have some product you can make fare.It is to do away with for
Correct your spelling
instance
instanse
Correct your spelling
instance
 if you have an egg meet onion, you will make good something. To conclude, in spite of
having
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
the fact that junk foods are delicious and admired by the masses of all groups these impose a plethora of health issues as well as make
people
Use synonyms
 unhealthy and
over-weight
Correct your spelling
overweight
show examples
.
Linking Words
Nevertheless
Add a comma
,Nevertheless
show examples
 I firmly believe that
consumption
Correct article usage
the consumption
show examples
 of these items is
Correct your spelling
harmful
harful
Correct your spelling
harmful
 to our
body
Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
show examples
 and mental health

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: