Some people think that the government should be responsible for crime prevention, while others believe that it is the responsibility of the individual to protect themselves. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #government #crime #prevention #responsibility

It is considered by some that violation prevention is responsible for politics,

also

some others think that it is individual responsibility; I agree with the

first

one I think if the authority set the right principles it affects the violation rate. On the one hand, self-protection is necessary for human lives, and it's an individual responsibility.

In other words

, If somebody doesn't have self-care and self-protection, they will face harm sooner than others. So

first

of all it's the responsibility of humans that protect themselves from faces to dangers and evil.

On the other hand

, the law should protect

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people from danger and crimes. For ,example if the ministry

Change the verb form

show examples

responsible for preventing corruption, it will monitor the felony rate and try to control it.

Finally

,in my opinion, it is necessary for people to protect themselves from being harmed and facing a

misdemeanor

Change the spelling

misdemeanour

show examples

But depends on the regime's function. The union should set the right principles for wrongdoing and criminals to prevent crime and decrease its rate of it. In conclusion, preventing

misdeed

Fix the agreement mistake

misdeeds

show examples

requires

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

responsible power in the background and

also

it needs people with a self-protection culture.

Submitted by wenglish995 on Thu Nov 24 2022

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

191 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.5

Complete response

4.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Fully explain your ideas

Art is considered as an important part of society as well as an expression of its culture. Do you think it is important to teach art to children? Do you think adolescent should be encouraged to focus on art rather than other subjects?

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