the maps below show an industrial area in the town of norbition, and planned future development of the site

the maps below show an industrial area in the town of norbition, and planned future development of the site
The maps
illustrates
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illustrate
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the
norbition
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nutrition
area in the present days,
as well as
,the planned development.
Overall
,the
town
will become more residential in most areas. It is noticeable that numerous amenities will be built in the
center
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centre
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of
town
.
It is clear that
the factories in the
town
center
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centre
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will be replaced by houses.A school will erect
in
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on
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the east side of the village to make way for the factory at present. There will be a playground near the river in the east -tern which is around the houses. So A
new
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newly
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constructed vehicle track from the playground to the school. It
also
will be extended across the river at the top of the map where a large house will be constructed and remain a part of
farmland
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the farmland
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.
In addition
,
There
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there
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will be shops and a medical centre at the roundabout in the middle of
town
.
Moreover
, a small roundabout will be erected near the big one toward the bottom of the map.
Submitted by josynguyen92 on

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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words town with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "maps" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "present" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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