Some people think that exercise is the key to health while others feel that having a balance diet is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

In
this
post-pandemic era, most
of
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apply
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the
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apply
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people
more
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are more
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aware
to
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of
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their health and want to live
healthy
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healthily
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.
Therefore
, there are many debates in choosing the best method to keep the
body
in good condition. Some
people
said that exercise is more important, while
the
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apply
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others think
diet
will affect more to
people
healthiness. Personally, I prefer to increase my physical activity by doing sports rather than being
stressful
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stressed
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about
diet
.
However
,
this
essay will discuss both perspectives and elaborate
each
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on each
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of them.
First
, it is obvious that physical activity is necessary
to
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for
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every human being
,
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apply
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because it keeps our metabolism running well. without it,
our
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the
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calories that we eat will be stored as fat and make us
becoming
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become
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overweight. Since obesity is not healthy, we have to keep our metabolism by doing some exercises or sports. Exercise will burn the calories into fuel
to
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for
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our
body
,
furthermore
, it will
also
burn our fat
that
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which
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could become the source of disease.
In
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On
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other
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the other
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hand,
people
who prefer
diet
mechanism
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mechanisms
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is keeping their metabolism running smoothly by limiting the calories that
their
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they
show examples
consume. By monitoring every
ingredients
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ingredient
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of the food,
diet
avoid the
body
to store any fat. it
also
maintains the sugar level in our
body
, so
people
will not face the risk of diabetes. To sum up, both methods can lead us to
healthy
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a healthy
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live
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life
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, each viewpoint has its own consideration and logical reason.
However
, we should not debate too much about the method, because it would be better if we apply both theories
,
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apply
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since each of them has many positive impacts.
Submitted by rahmanda.nofal on

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    • Sentence 2 - Example
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