IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

As public safety is of the highest importance, it is often necessary to test new products on animals. It is better for a few animals to suffer from for human life to be placed at risk by untested products. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

A fair amount of the public believes that the life of only a few
animals
Use synonyms
 is put
suffering
Change preposition
through suffering
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 by researchers to qualify new medicines for human use .
Linking Words
however
Fix capitalization
However
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, I partly agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 the reasons for my argument are mentioned in
forthcoming
Correct article usage
the forthcoming
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 paragraphs. One of the main reasons is that the discovery of new drugs is of utmost importance for the
public
Punctuation problem
public,
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 as people are suffering from a lot of diseases which are affecting their health in a disastrous way.
when
Fix capitalization
When
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 the animal is administered
with some
Replace the word
a certain
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 drug, it will show certain responses which will be of enormous benefit to scientists.
scientists
Fix capitalization
Scientists
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 came to know about the behaviour shown by the animal with respect to specific medicine
Punctuation problem
. .consequently
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.
Correct your spelling
Consequently
consequently
Linking Words
, researchers could use these outcomes to discover
some
Correct determiner usage
a
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 vaccine or medicine which will be used by
masses
Correct article usage
the masses
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 for the treatment of
disease
Correct article usage
the disease
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.
In contrast
Linking Words
 ,
animals
Use synonyms
 are as significant as Homo sapiens . owing to
this
Linking Words
, fauna is the most beautiful creation of god and is responsible for maintaining the balance of the ecosystem .Each species
depend
Correct subject-verb agreement
depends
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 on
one another
Use the right word
the others
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 for food .
if
Fix capitalization
If
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one is lost,the food chain will be disrupted.
Linking Words
as
Fix capitalization
As
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 a result, the cycle of interdependence gets disturbed
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 some other
animals
Use synonyms
 will
also
Linking Words
 become extinct.
Linking Words
in
Fix capitalization
In
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 addition,certain endangered species
also
Linking Words
get
Verb problem
become
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 extinct.
Linking Words
for
Fix capitalization
For
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 instance ,the keystone species
like
Punctuation problem
, like
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tiger
Correct article usage
the tiger
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,
Punctuation problem
apply
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and
lion
Punctuation problem
lion,
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 depend upon
animals
Use synonyms
 like deer and fox for their food.
To conclude
Linking Words
 ,
although
Linking Words
 animal trials are necessary for the invention of new products ,wildlife
also
Linking Words
 plays a pivotal role in providing ecological balance for the survival of planet
'
Punctuation problem
apply
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Earth
'
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
.

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task
State a clear view in the intro and restate it in the conclusion.
coherence
Use one idea per paragraph and begin each with a clear topic sentence.
task
Give more specific examples and explain how they support your view.
language
Check grammar and punctuation; fix run-on sentences and capitalization.
content
The essay shows an effort to discuss both sides.
structure
There is an attempt to give a conclusion that matches the introduction.
coherence
The topic is relevant and uses linking words at points.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • public safety
  • untested products
  • animal welfare
  • moral implications
  • scientific validity
  • alternative methods
  • regulations
  • ethical considerations
  • technological developments
  • public sentiment
  • activism
  • societal values
What to do next:
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