IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Some people think the best way to stay fit is joining a gym/helath club while others think doing everyday activities such as walking and climbing stairs is sufficient. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #gym #helath #club #activities #stairs
Nowadays, due to the widespread use of
technologies
, educational institutions are provided with high-tech teaching aids, Internet libraries, equipped with state-of-the-art practical laboratories. It should be noted, that digital educational
technologies
 are an innovative way of organizing the academic process, based on the use of electronic systems. In order to weigh the pros and cons, we note that among the advantages of introducing high-tech facilities in the preparation of students, in dissertation research on pedagogy the following are noted: - increasing the visibility and the mobility in studying materials and training tasks; - providing students with instant access to the results immediately after completing the task and prompt feedback from the teacher; - increasing the lively interest and motivation of students.
However
, without contradicting the above, in public discussions educators and health professionals agree that the following shortcomings can be identified as the generally recognized negative impact of the Internet on people's psychology: increased isolation, replacement of reality with virtual space, reduced physical activity for excessive immersion in digital
technologies
. In my opinion, it is clear that the advantages of using technology outweigh the disadvantages.
This
 is expressed in the fact that it is possible to get rid of shortcomings due to the correct organization of the lifestyle of children on the part of parents and self-discipline. At the same time, the intensification of the educational process, and
hence
 the improvement in the quality of human activity are solved in our time with the help of the introduction of digital
technologies
.
Submitted by dulskywork on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: