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Writing Samples
Band 7

All the people in a company should be treated equally and provided with the same numbers of vacations in a year.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #company #numbers #vacations #year
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Today, almost all companies in the world are governed by laws to avoid discrimination in the
work
Use synonyms
 environment.
As a result
Linking Words
 of
this
Linking Words
, many people believe all should be treated in an equal manner at the workplace and should be allowed to have the same number of
vacations
Use synonyms
 for all.
However
Linking Words
, I believe, in terms of treating, all should be treated in a common manner while
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
vacations
Use synonyms
, it should be based on performance or the nature of
work
Use synonyms
. Any employee of an organization, they are given a particular task which could be either crucial or general.
However
Linking Words
, the performing of that particular task is really important to the operation and for the output of the organization.
Hence
Linking Words
, it is required to treat all employees in a similar manner rather than discriminating based on different factors
such
Linking Words
 as their job role, gender or their level in the company. As an example, a person who is working in the cleaning department and a person who is at the top management should be governed by the same rules and regulations of the company.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, leaves should not be a facility taken for granted. In terms of
vacations
Use synonyms
, of
course
Add a comma
,course
show examples
 there should be a minimum number of leaves per year as per government regulations.
However
Linking Words
, there could be facilities for additional leaves for selected workers based on extraordinary factors
such
Linking Words
 as their nature of
work
Use synonyms
 or their output. As an example, if the efficiency of a worker is above the average or if someone working continuous night shifts, can be allowed to have additional leaves and even they could be considered as a reward for their
work
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. In summary, it is no doubt that all employees of a company should be treated evenly.
However
Linking Words
, I believe there can be distinguished benefits
such
Linking Words
 as special
vacations
Use synonyms
 based on their output or
nature
Correct article usage
the nature
show examples
 of their
work
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by maheshweee on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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