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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people prefer to work in the same type of job throughout their lifetime ‎while others like to change the type of job they do. Discuss both views and give ‎your opinion.‎

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Many people often change jobs
while
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 others prefer to work for the same company for life. Both these approaches have merits and drawbacks. In
this
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 essay, I will explore the advantages and disadvantages of both conventions of career choice. On the one hand, there are several advantages to working in the same type of
job
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 throughout one's life.
Firstly
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, individuals have a higher chance of receiving promotions within their organization.
Moreover
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,
this
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 stability ensures that workers will have a consistent income.
For example
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, a teacher is provided with an amount of money every month for their teaching
job
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 because they are continuing to do their
job
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 every single day.
On the other hand
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, for some challenging lovers, coming to a new
job
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 is extremely good for them
due to
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 some reasons.
Firstly
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, it will be their opportunity to experience new things, especially for those who have not known about their dream
job
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 yet. That will be a time to try and they will understand more about themself on what they can do.
Moreover
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, moving to a new place in a new
job
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 position can provide workers with an attractive salary. Some companies are eager to pay more to recruit a candidate
that is
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 suitable for a new position, and that will be the chance
for earning
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to earn
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 more money. In my point of view, I prefer
this
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 side to the one below because it fixes my personality. In conclusion, it can be seen that both statements have their own values and advantages.
However
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, I love the second opinion because it can give me more opportunities and an expected income.

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task achievement
Make sure your examples are detailed and relevant to strengthen your arguments. For instance, when discussing income stability, consider providing more context or specific scenarios that illustrate your point better.
coherence and cohesion
Pay attention to sentence structure to enhance readability. The flow of ideas would benefit from clearer transitions between points.
task achievement
You have presented a balanced discussion of both views, which is a key requirement of the task.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your opinion, reinforcing your stance on the topic.
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