some people believe that mordern technology encourages more social behaviour, others believe it has made people less socialable. give views and opinion

In
this
era,I believe that
advancement
in technology is impeccable and commendable everyone has the access to being social and connecting with all incidents that happen in the surrounding.I strongly believe that it must play an appropriate role for individuals to know everything happening in the world
for instance
, in my opinion,
this
one is beneficial
also
to be a part of a new journey. On the one hand, in ,past all people are not able to bring social body because they have no access to
such
things or they used PTC for calls if their beloved no near to them or they use the radio it takes much time to go through the news that they really want to listen,
although
they are away from the stress of
this
the cons are more
then
pros.
for example
in countries where is not the facility of internet and television they are underdeveloped because they have no idea how crucial is become
environmental
Add an article
an environmental
show examples
influencer and they cannot make progress.
on the other hand
,if individuals have an idea of how to be
accessedaccessible
Correct your spelling
accessed accessible
on
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
or Facebook and Instagram it is advantageous for them to become a community body
instead
if they do have not
advancement
use
this
one that helps them to become more social.
for example
.if someone wants to improve his business nowadays,
advancement
in technology plays a vital role to achieve all the goals that they dream about To summarize, in my ,opinion
advancement
in the facilities of machinery take a pivotal part in social behaving becoming a social body through access to automation we approach the destination where there we really want to and become prosperous
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
if we have the information about social media how to use and create marvellous things.
Submitted by talhapanyar on

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    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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