some people believe that mordern technology encourages more social behaviour, others believe it has made people less socialable. give views and opinion

#people #mordern #technology #behaviour #socialable

this

era,I believe that

advancement

in technology is impeccable and commendable everyone has the access to being social and connecting with all incidents that happen in the surrounding.I strongly believe that it must play an appropriate role for individuals to know everything happening in the world

for instance

, in my opinion,

this

one is beneficial

also

to be a part of a new journey. On the one hand, in ,past all people are not able to bring social body because they have no access to

such

things or they used PTC for calls if their beloved no near to them or they use the radio it takes much time to go through the news that they really want to listen,

although

they are away from the stress of

this

the cons are more

then

pros.

for example

in countries where is not the facility of internet and television they are underdeveloped because they have no idea how crucial is become

environmental

Add an article

an environmental

show examples

influencer and they cannot make progress.

on the other hand

,if individuals have an idea of how to be

accessedaccessible

Correct your spelling

accessed accessible

internet

Correct article usage

the internet

show examples

or Facebook and Instagram it is advantageous for them to become a community body

instead

if they do have not

advancement

use

this

one that helps them to become more social.

for example

.if someone wants to improve his business nowadays,

advancement

in technology plays a vital role to achieve all the goals that they dream about To summarize, in my ,opinion

advancement

in the facilities of machinery take a pivotal part in social behaving becoming a social body through access to automation we approach the destination where there we really want to and become prosperous

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

if we have the information about social media how to use and create marvellous things.

Submitted by talhapanyar on Sun Nov 27 2022

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Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
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Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

291 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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some people believe that mordern technology encourages more social behaviour, others believe it has made people less socialable. give views and opinion

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think every human being can create artworks (e.g. painting), while others think only the people born with the ability can do that. Discuss both views and give your opinion.（2015/10/31亚太）

People believe that Generation Z (1997-2007) are more dishonest than previous generations. What is the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Some people feel a country can't be economically progressive and environmentally friendly at the same time. Others disagree with this view. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.

Nowadays, education overseas has become more accessible and growing numbers of people send their offspring to study in other countries. However, this trend has its detractors. I strongly believe that the pros far outweigh the cons, and will examine both below.

In the future all cars, buses and dricks will be driverless. The only people traveling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?