Financial education should be a mandatory part of the school program. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement.

There is no doubt that nowadays financial knowledge is crucial in basic life. One of the key factors of being successful and becoming rich is the skill of managing cash.

Consequently

Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, in order to grow up forthcoming financially literate people and entrepreneurs who will contribute to the development of the state’s economy, commercial education should be a part of the academy program. Educating students about cash matters in academy walls shed light on their imminent.

The early

Correct article usage

Early

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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financial acquisition helps children not only understand that even coins are acquired through labour, but

also

Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

teaches them how to handle

money

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

skillfully and save it. It is already recognized that the top five rich people in the world have the ability to manage

money

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

since their childhood. Indeed, it is important for kids to have a serious and right attitude towards

money

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

early on. Nobody can argue with

a

Correct article usage

the

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fact that the future development rate of every country depends on the skills of today’s teenagers.

Consequently

Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, educating on managing cash in school years will result in a graduating of versatile students with high basic and financial literacy.

Learning

Add the particle

toLearning

It appears that the verb manage should be in the to-infinitive form. Consider adding the word to.

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manage

money

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

wisely will prevent poverty in students’ life, which contributes to the country’s economy. For ,instance in the year ,2008 the British government successfully incorporated financial literacy pieces of training into the school program. It developed in children the ability to act independently to improve the conditions of their own lives and the well-being of society. To summarize, in my personal view, the school curriculum should include the required financial education. It will affect not only on apprentice’s life

,

Remove the comma

apply

The comma before the conjunction but also appears to be unnecessary. Consider removing it.

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but

also

Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

on state’s future.