IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

You have an appointment with your manager the next day. Write him/her a letter about what you’re going to discuss at the meeting. In your meeting, you should tell: What did you do for the company during the years you worked there, What changes you would like to recommend, What training you require

Dear Mr Musk, I have an appointment with you tomorrow and would like to discuss my role and our team’s progress.
Firstly
Linking Words
, I have worked for almost five years in the purchasing department. As a senior manager, I lead the sales team and nurture customer relationships. Over the
last
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 three years, during the cessation process, our division launched Elmo Aid. It was well-received
due to
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 clear goals and effective teamwork. We achieved a 50% rise in purchases compared with
last
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 year,
while
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 maintaining harmony within the group.
Secondly
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, our efforts helped speed up the merger of the two companies, and the transition occurred smoothly.
Thirdly
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, I propose actions to sustain sales and profitability. I suggest the Human Resources Department participate in the meeting to discuss staff motivation and development. For training, I would like to undertake a certificate in Business Analytics to improve performance tracking. I am ready to start at once and can share a proposed plan if helpful. I look forward to our discussion. Thank you for your time. Best regards Joanna

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improvement
Be clear about the changes you want. Give exact steps and a time plan.
improvement
Add a short plan for training with a time line and why it helps.
improvement
Put one idea in each paragraph and use simple links to move from one idea to next.
tone
Polite and respectful tone.
results
Gives real work and result numbers.
initiative
Shows you are ready to learn and plan.
Structure your letter

A letter needs to be written using a proper format, including the following:

  • A greeting (Dear sir/madam, Dear John, Dear Mr. Smith)
  • The main body (consisting of paragraphs for each part of the letter)
  • A closing (Yours sincerely, Yours faithfully, Best wishes, Kind regards, Love)

When writing a letter as part of the IELTS General Training Writing Task 1, it is important to include the bullet points presented to you in the question.

All three bullet points need to be presented. And remember that some bullet points contain more than one element. So, make sure to watch for ‘and’ and plurals.

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