IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Some teachers think that international students exchange would be beneficial for all teenage school students. Advantages outweigh disadvantages?

#teachers #students #exchange #school
These days, some teachers argue that exchange programs would bring
benefits
 to all
students
, while others consider that
this
 trend could bring disadvantages too. For me, I totally admit that more
benefits
 are significant. On the one hand, there are several
benefits
 of international student exchange. The most obvious advantage is that the
students
 gain
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
lifetime experience.
This
 results from the fact that they must approach a new culture and adapt to
this
,
such
 as
:
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 food, scenery and people.
This
 leads to their mind-broadening, the international student exchange accepts
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people with different views. Another merit worth mentioning is that living abroad provides them with opportunities to have a brighter future. They can learn in the same scheme as another language which improves their English skill.
Besides
, they will be studied at prestigious educational institutions and get certificates and qualifications.
Thus
, they will get
first
 impressions with candidates when they start their
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
show examples
.
On the other hand
, the drawbacks of overseas
students
 are undeniable. The
first
 disadvantage is the high cost, the biggest concern for financially weaker sections will have the burden because of high tuition. The
second
 downside is that some teenagers are too young to have
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
high regard for an experience abroad.
This
 can be seen in other countries where they focus on studying without activities since they are afraid of affecting their academic results.
As a result
, the student was affected by stress or depression. In conclusion,
although
 overseas
students
 might have some detrimental effects, the outstanding
benefits
 are overshadowed by the merits. Teenagers should be encouraged to participate in these programs.
Submitted by ncnnhi13 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: