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Writing Samples /
Band 5

Many believe that individuals can do little to improve the environment. Only governments and large companies can make a real difference. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#individuals #environment #governments #companies #difference
As human beings have kept
exhausitng
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exhausting
 the resources from nature, serious environmental problems have been
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occurring
occuring
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occurring
 like climate change and species
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extinction
extinctions
extionction
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extinction
. Along these, the importance of improving
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
show examples
 had been increased
accordingly
. Some people insist that individuals are able to help
environment
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the environment
show examples
, but others argue that only huge organizations like governments or companies can offer meaningful
aids
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aid
show examples
.
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Admittedly
Admitedly
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Admittedly
, people can make
superfical
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superficial
 differences for the
environment
 around them.
For example
, the number of trees on
Korean
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the Korean
show examples
Correct your spelling
peninsula
Penninsula
penninsula
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Peninsula
 and
proportion
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the proportion
show examples
 of trees in
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a forest
the forest
show examples
forest
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forests
show examples
 in Korea had
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
dramatically grown after
declare
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declaring
show examples
 of the national holiday called '
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Tree Day'. Every citizen
rooted
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roots
show examples
 a tree in
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a neighborhood
show examples
neighborhood
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neighbourhood
show examples
 or mountain every Tree Day, and it makes Korea
more
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apply
show examples
greener than before. Even though it is the government who designed
this
 movement, it shows that individuals have
ability
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the ability
show examples
 to improve
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
.
However
, I agree with
statement
Correct article usage
the statement
show examples
 arguing it is the large companies who can create effective changes for
environment
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the environment
show examples
. According to the study, about 80
percent
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per cent
show examples
 of
garbages
Correct subject-verb agreement
garbage
show examples
 that
cause
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causes
show examples
devilous
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devious
 pollution is from
corporation's
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corporations'
show examples
 manufacturing activities.
Accretion
Correct article usage
The accretion
show examples
 of the harmful compounds from these commercial conductions is too tremendous to be appeased by other little efforts for
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
. Considering the magnitude of
environmental
Correct article usage
the environmental
show examples
 impact from
enterpreneurs
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entrepreneurs
,
company
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the company
show examples
 is the only one who can make a stark difference. In conclusion,
although
 there are some environmental improvements from individuals, it is negligible compared to how wide and
strong
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strongly
show examples
 large companies give
impacts
Correct subject-verb agreement
impact
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
environment
.
Therefore
 it is better to invest in
eco friendly
Add a hyphen
eco-friendly
show examples
 activities in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
large organizations
are
Correct pronoun usage
that are
show examples
 more helpful for our sustainability.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • environmental awareness
  • sustainable practices
  • renewable energy
  • carbon footprint
  • waste reduction
  • conservation
  • ecosystem
  • pollution
  • climate change
  • responsibility
  • leadership
  • legislation
  • investment
  • collaboration
  • systemic change
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