It has been noted that many people who had a big impact on the world gave themselves completely to their work and did not bother with the idea of “work-life balance”. To what extent should people try to have a good work-life balance? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #impact #world #work #idea #“work-life #balance” #work-life #balance

As we can see in many biographies, famous

people

tended to devote all their lives to their careers, which

make

Correct subject-verb agreement

makes

show examples

some

people

wonder whether we should take the

work-

life

balance

idea seriously.

However

, I strongly agree that the

work-

life

balance

is crucial to our lives.

First

of all, the meaning of

life

is not only defined by our social

success

, but

also

by our relations with families and friends. We are social creatures,

therefore

we need relationships to fill in our emotional void. We couldn't let our job

Fix the infinitive

apply

show examples

take away the

time

which should be spent on enjoying family

time

and building bonds with friends.

Besides

, no one is in the right place to say that a good husband or a caring friend is less successful than

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people

who

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

achieved

successes

Fix the agreement mistake

success

show examples

in their careers.

Secondly

work-

life

balance

is not only beneficial to our physical beings

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

plays a critical role in our mental health. Even machines need to rest from

time

, let alone human beings. Working without rest means damaging physical and mental well-being, which won't serve us any good. Many chronic diseases and injuries are caused by long

time

work, and greatly impair

people

life

quality.

Therefore

, it's unwise to ignore our leisure

time

for the sake of achieving some banal

success

. In conclusion, we should not bother with the idea that

success

means abandoning the

work-

life

balance

lifestyle, because the meaning of

success

life

has various explanations.

Besides

, we shall take care of our health, since it is vital to our

life

quality.

Hence

, we should try our best to have a good

work-

life

balance

lifestyle.

Submitted by princewangzi1990 on Fri Dec 02 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

275 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

Topic Vocabulary:

Well-being
Productivity
Fulfilling
Time management
Prioritize
Burnout
Boundaries
Dedication
Personal fulfillment
Efficiency

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
Parents of obese children should be punished for making them fat. Do you agree or disagree
In modern world a discussion of necessity for parents of overweighted kids to be legally restricted become a problem. This essay agrees with the previous statement because of the fact that obese children's weight leads to poor health condition and bullying at the school.
7
band
An increasing number of students are choosing to study abroad. To what extent does this trend benefit the students themselves and the countries involved? What are the drawbacks?
There is no doubt that these days a large number of students are interested in pursuing their education in foreign countries. This approach, however, not only enriches students' knowledge and skills but also makes a significant contribution to improving the country's socio-economic development over the years.
7
band
Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it.
There has been a consensus among a number of the public, that advertising is of great importance in making people buy products. However, another group is against this, and they believe advertising is no longer useful to us as we do not make them count in our attention.
5.5
band
These days many parents want their children to study a second language such as English. Do you think it is important for younger children to study a new language? Do you think schools should teach every student in primary school a second language?
Nowadays,a lot of families want their children to master another language namely English.In my opinion,it is essential for children to learn a new language because it will help them understand foreign cultures and improve their knowledge, and therefore, schools ought to teach primary school students a second language.
<4
band
students are becoming more and more reliant on the internet. while the internet is convenient, it has many negative effects and its use for educational purposes should be restricted. how far do you agree with this statement?
In thi contemporary world, advancement in technology made pupils life more facilitate and, as a result, they can gain knowledge from internet any time; however, some think that it is very convenient to use, but it ihas also some detrimental impact on student, thus it would be banned for education purpose. In my opinion, it gives more fruitful outcome to use internet for education rather than negative effect.

Fully explain your ideas

Parents of obese children should be punished for making them fat. Do you agree or disagree

An increasing number of students are choosing to study abroad. To what extent does this trend benefit the students themselves and the countries involved? What are the drawbacks?

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it.

These days many parents want their children to study a second language such as English. Do you think it is important for younger children to study a new language? Do you think schools should teach every student in primary school a second language?

students are becoming more and more reliant on the internet. while the internet is convenient, it has many negative effects and its use for educational purposes should be restricted. how far do you agree with this statement?