IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

Scientists believe that in order to protect the environment, people must use less energy in their daily lives. However, most people have not changed the way they live. Why do you think many people have not taken individual action? What could be done to encourage them to take action?

#scientists #environment #people #energy #lives #action
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There has been an unprecedented utilization of
energy
, especially in day-to-day activities. Scientists have claimed that in order to protect the environment, it is essential to put a stop to these activities. Society has sadly, neglected the impact caused thereby not changing their behaviour. I will elucidate why individuals do not take action at a personal level and what can be done to inculcate good practices in them.
Firstly
, in my opinion, citizens are extremely preoccupied. They solely focus on their work ,
for example
. If a person is always engaged at work, they are not in touch with reality. They do not read the newspapers as a consequence. Since they do not know about current affairs, the question of taking action does not arise.
Secondly
, people are selfish. In India, during the festival of Diwali, Indians burn firecrackers. Conspicuously, they are self-interested. They are not only hesitating to act in a certain way to prevent environmental hazards but are acting against them.
Although
 things might seem to be impossible to fix, there are a few practices that every individual can unanimously follow. People should take an effort to learn innovative concepts on how to sustain non-renewable
energy
 sources. To illustrate, they can install solar panels on their rooftops
instead
 of using gas. In
this
 way, they are able to harness
energy
 without depleting it.
Furthermore
, government authorities should make environmental studies a compulsory subject. If students learn and understand the problems faced, they will eventually become more empathetic toward the environment. They will protect it,
as a result
. To sum up, if the guidelines for how to conserve
energy
 are strictly followed, we will definitely be one step ahead in the quest to protect our country.
Submitted by dylan7rdgz on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: