IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

The Internet has a bigger impact on people's lives because it is more popular than television

#internet #impact #people #lives #television
TV is less popular than
Internet
Correct article usage
the Internet
show examples
 due to
this
 it has the t it is
huge
Add an article
the huge
a huge
show examples
affect
Replace the word
effect
show examples
on
human's
Change noun form
human
show examples
 life. I agree that the
internet
 has a bigger impact because it is easy
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 use and people get a lot of information from
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
 every day.
To get
Change the verb form
Getting
show examples
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
access to the
internet
 is not difficult. People could use their phones,
laptops
Correct word choice
and laptops
show examples
 to search
information
Change preposition
for information
show examples
 outside which they are not able to do with television .
For
example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
 if
antenna
Add an article
the antenna
show examples
 is connected
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
screen
Correct article usage
the screen
show examples
 incorrectly,
then
 the TV will not work and the smartphone can work without any wires .
Moreover
,
Correct article usage
the
show examples
source of the most of information writing is the
internet
. As mentioned it is easy to find answers
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
user's
Fix the agreement mistake
users'
show examples
 questions by using
world
Correct article usage
the world
show examples
 wide web than television
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because TV channels demonstrate content that allows them censorship
although
 the WWW includes a wide range of knowledge .
For instance
,
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Russia banned showing details of
war
Add an article
the war
show examples
 between them and Ukraine. To conclude the
Internet
 has become very popular and has replaced television
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because now people can watch any program they are interested in.
Submitted by bekeyeva_a on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: