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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people believe that violence in the media, such as in television programs and films, directly results in violent behaviour. To what extent do you agree or disagree

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It is the general perspective of the public that aggressiveness depicted in the movies and telecasts of mass media is correlated to fierce demeanours in individuals. I partially agree with the given statement as it differs from person to person. On the one hand, the violence portrayed in social media has some adverse results on others.
Firstly
, juveniles try to imitate their ideals as they are not mature enough to create a difference between fiction and reality.
For example
, many children have done suicidal attempts due to their addiction to the well-known game PUBG and many become very abusive in their behaviours.
Secondly
, these types of serials can have a psychological effect on people because everyone perceives distinctively to these screenplays
like
Change preposition
apply
show examples
, some can get stressed out after watching evil characters on television which could cause aggressive attitudes and in the same manner a humorous drama can give happiness to its audience.
On the contrary
, real life is separate from reel and people eventually get
this
 understanding by observing their favourite programs
for
Add the comma(s)
,for
show examples
 instance, many television reality shows display fights and cruel actions of others which cannot be bearable in society and are unnatural.
Moreover
, these plays do not get much attention from the general public because of their brutal nature and
thus
 they can have just a temporary impact on others. To recapitulate, after discussing both views, I believe that harsh and barbarous broadcasts do have serious consequences on some human beings,
however
, their effects wear off quickly and these attitudes are not promoted by anyone in society.
Submitted by mairaakram28 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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