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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Nowadays, with advance of technology and transportation facilities, people can work and live anywhere they want. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages and give your opinion.

#advance #technology #transportation #facilities #people #work
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In recent years,
tech
Use synonyms
 and
transportation
Use synonyms
 systems have been progressing dramatically and thanks to
such
Linking Words
 development,
people
Use synonyms
 have massive options to decide about their intended
cites
Correct your spelling
sites
show examples
 of working and living. While
such
Linking Words
advancement
Fix the agreement mistake
advancements
show examples
bring
Change the verb form
brings
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 some opportunities
such
Linking Words
 as
remote-working
Correct your spelling
remote working
show examples
 and connecting
people
Use synonyms
 from different regions,
negative
Correct article usage
the negative
show examples
 impact on the way
people
Use synonyms
 communicate is undeniable. Despite
this
Linking Words
, in my view plus points of improvement in technology and
transportation
Use synonyms
 industries is so valuable that the drawbacks can be overlooked. In
this
Linking Words
 regard,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 will discuss
pros
Correct article usage
the pros
show examples
 against cons as follows: There are many benefits
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
development
Add an article
the development
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
tech
Correct article usage
the tech
show examples
 industry and
transportation
Use synonyms
system
Fix the agreement mistake
systems
show examples
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, high technology
give
Change the verb form
gives
show examples
 employees
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
permission to work all
through
Change preposition
over
show examples
 the world.
this
Linking Words
 is to say that in
this
Linking Words
 tight labour market, employers show
tendency
Add an article
a tendency
the tendency
show examples
 to hire skilled workers from different countries. It’s a mutual achievement since
client
Fix the agreement mistake
clients
show examples
 find
required
Correct article usage
the required
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 labour and workforces may make
profit
Correct article usage
a profit
show examples
 from
exchange
Add an article
an exchange
the exchange
show examples
 rate of currencies.
For example
Linking Words
 one of my friends live in Tehran and work from home for a company in Germany and she earns money in
dollar
Add an article
the dollar
show examples
 which is more valuable than local currency.
Secondly
Linking Words
, in the past owing lack of enough facilities for
transportation
Use synonyms
,
people
Use synonyms
 had to live close to their workplace or stand difficulties
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 transporting but nowadays commuting infrastructure
such
Linking Words
 as roads,
public
Correct word choice
and public
show examples
transportation
Use synonyms
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 expanded and facilitate for
people
Use synonyms
 to work far from their offices.
for instance
Linking Words
, in my country instruction of
subway
Correct article usage
the subway
show examples
 which connects Karaj to Tehran makes it convenient for commuters to transport.
Finally
Linking Words
, with
such
Linking Words
 mentioned pros,
beneficials
Correct your spelling
beneficiaries
 of
tech
Use synonyms
 and transport facilities
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 higher than
losses
Correct article usage
the losses
show examples
.
Conversely
Linking Words
, there are some disadvantages in
this
Linking Words
 regard. With
Add an article
the advance
show examples
advance
Fix the agreement mistake
advances
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of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 technology,
people
Use synonyms
 do everything
digital
Change preposition
on digital
show examples
 platforms.
this
Linking Words
 is not to say that it prevents
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
wasting time and
facilitate
Correct subject-verb agreement
facilitates
show examples
 many things, but it
effects
Correct your spelling
affects
show examples
 badly on communication style.
In other words
Linking Words
, social media are replaceable
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 physical visiting. As an example, many
people
Use synonyms
 communicate with each other through video
call
Fix the agreement mistake
calls
show examples
 or chat
instead
Linking Words
 of
get
Change the verb form
getting
show examples
 gathering or hanging out.
Correct your spelling
In spite
Inspite
Correct your spelling
In spite
 of
this
Linking Words
, the pros of
such
Linking Words
 improvement outweigh
cons
Correct article usage
the cons
show examples
. To sum up, along with
bad
Add an article
the bad
show examples
 effect on
connection
Correct article usage
the connection
show examples
 way with
tech
Use synonyms
 advances, there are many positive points like long-distance working and facilitation in transporting which make that makes the advantages surpass the disadvantages.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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