The continued rise in the world's population is the greatest problem faced by humanity at the present time. What are the causes of this continued rise? Do you agree thet it is the greatest problem faced by humanity?

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Some individuals believe that the world's human population is constantly growing, and

this

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problem has become the most serious, which humanity has to conquer. In my opinion, the reason for

that is

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the improvement in healthcare. I strongly agree that

this

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is problematic because of the limitation of natural resources for an enlarged population. In comparison to recent years, there has been an impressive development in medicine. New

therapies

Fix the agreement mistake

therapy

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schemas, drugs and availability of medical support successfully help people to provide professional healthcare.

Moreover

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, the modern management of many therapeutic procedures has become a standard of treatment.

As a result

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, many citizens can effortlessly contact doctors and get the necessary help.

In addition

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, there are dedicated specialists and clinics to treat elderly patients.

For

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this

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reason, the average life expectancy increased considerably, and cities became crowded.

For example

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, the percentage of old patients in hospitals is higher than younger generations.

On the other hand

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, overpopulation is a serious problem because of limited natural sources of energetic materials. More people are living, and more electricity is required. Unfortunately, the main providers of electrical fuel are coal, gas and oil. These materials are unrenewable, which means they can be depleted. The electricity needs in crowded cities are enormous, so the environment is becoming overused.

Therefore

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, the production of that energy is

also

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devastating to nature.

For instance

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, the usage of fossil fuels as a source of energy is limited in many highly populated European countries. In conclusion, overpopulation is one of the most important issues, that the modern world has to face.

However

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, the development of medicine is one of the reasons

due to

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extended lifetime. I believe that the growing number of people is one of the greatest problems

due to

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the increase in energy usage and

consequently

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harmful impact on the environment.

radomskaigaMon Dec 05 2022

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coherence cohesion

Your essay demonstrates good coherence and cohesion, with a logical structure and clear introduction and conclusion. Make sure to provide more specific examples to support your points.

task achievement

Your essay provides a complete response to the task, with clear and comprehensive ideas. Consider providing more depth in your analysis and examples to fully address the complexity of the issue.

14
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

302 words

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The continued rise in the world's population is the greatest problem faced by humanity at the present time. What are the causes of this continued rise? Do you agree thet it is the greatest problem faced by humanity?

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Some people believe that modern inventions bring problems than benefits. Do you agree or disagree.

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some expert believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than at secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?