Some people believe that children should be given a smartphone as soon as they begin their elementary school studies. Others believe this may harm a child’s development and parents should wait until their children are older and mature enough to handle the responsibilities of having a smartphone. Which view do you agree with? What might some consequences be of giving a young child a smartphone?

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The argument about what age is more convenient for children to have mobile

phones

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is an ongoing debate among parents. Many people think that elementary school

students

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should have

phones

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while others suggest waiting until they mature enough to have which I agree with more. Since

smartphones

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may distract

students

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at an early age and encourage them to play

games

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via

phones

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when they have to study. The possible consequences might be lower grades than peers who do not have

phones

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and addiction to

games

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First

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and foremost, it is obvious why people think to buy

smartphones

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for their children since we live in a digital era.

However

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, giving mobile

phones

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to elementary school

students

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means offering them a distracting toy because they are too young to be responsible.

Therefore

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, they may distract their attention by using

phones

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during classes.

Furthermore

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, the developed

smartphones

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are multifactional so

students

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might play video

games

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as well.

For example

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, considering they do not responsible enough to use it wisely, their desire for

games

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might transform into screen addiction in the future.

On the other hand

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, the possible results of giving children mobiles without waiting for their maturity might cause some problems for

students

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. If they use their

phones

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during classes and study

instead

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of giving attention to subjects, their grades will be lower than their classmates who do not have

phones

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In addition

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, giving young ones

smartphones

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may encourage them to play video

games

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more and they may end up an addiction to

games

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in the future

for example

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. To summarize, whereas many people advocate giving

smartphones

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to kids at an early age, others and I disagree. Providing multifactional technology to

students

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may distract them and drop their grades and

also

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encourage them to get addicted to

games

Use synonyms

ecemanginnTue Dec 06 2022

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

295 words

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