Today, people in many countries have to spend more and more time away from their families. Why is this happening? What effects does this have on the people themselves and on their families?

A lot of people nowadays have to live far away from their
families
,
due to
the increasing opportunities and mobilization in urban areas. It is a far better chance to land a high-income job and build an outstanding career
from
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in
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the most developed cities of the country rather than
the
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in the
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countryside. As a result, many have made a choice to travel and work from infrastructural cities and try to support their
families
from there.
This
has brought big social consequences that are getting worse by
Correct article usage
the days
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days
Fix the agreement mistake
day
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. It has brought a rise
of
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in
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workaholics, whose schedule is working overtime and trying to make as much money and progress
possible
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as possible
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. Workhorse culture is becoming drastically more popular in Asian countries, especially Japan where employees who show dedication and commitment to their company have a chance of promotion. Needless to say, the competition is over the top that’s why having free time for your family is a privilege not everyone can have. To look even
further
into the effects of
this
phenomenon, it can
see
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be seen
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that the economic miracle of the
20 th
Correct your spelling
20th
century had a consumptive effect on large
families
. Japanese, parents, especially the father, who has to work long shifts at the office, may go on for days or even weeks without seeing the face of their children. That being the case
this
situation results in people not valuing
families
as much as they used to. It
also
increases the decrease in population since the birth rate decreases. Loneliness and relationships
also
become a problem for workaholics that’s why suicides and lonely deaths rise quickly. All of
this
can
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and more can become a reality
to
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for
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any nation around the world
,
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apply
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if they don’t decide
the
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on the
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solutions for modernization. In summary, the collapse of family
bond
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bonds
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has been underway for quite some time now, and it has already taken its toll on many societies, of which Japan is a prime example. A solution is needed now to restore the once strong and inseparable bond between the bloodline
,
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apply
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so that it won’t be too late to have a normal family.
Submitted by oimigle on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • demands of the workplace
  • digital technology
  • social media
  • individualism
  • erosion of family bonds
  • emotional distance
  • strain relationships
  • emotional support
  • negative impact
  • emotional, social, and academic challenges
  • neglected
  • guidance and support
  • stress and mental health issues
  • anxiety
  • depression
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