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Band 6.5

In some countries, there has been an increase in adverstisements that try to persuade children to buy snacks, toys and other items. Parents often argue that these announcements are unfair. Discuss both perspectives and give your opinion?

#countries #adverstisements #children #snacks #toys #items #parents #announcements #perspectives
While It is no longer news that many nations of the world have been experiencing a rise in
advertisements
 that encourage
children
 to indulge in snacking,
toys
 and many other items, several
parents
 found these unfavourable. Meanwhile, a few others may have an opposing view.
This
 passage will juxtapose both sides with my supporting opinions.
To begin
 with the views of the majority of
parents
 who found these
advertisements
 unwelcoming, there could be a few reasons for
this
. An important one is that it gets
children
 distracted from their studies.
In other words
, they tend to spend more than playing with
toys
 rather than studying.
For example
, a recent UK survey carried out by primary school teachers in 2019, revealed that school
children
 that have low grades are not only academically poor but
also
 result from distractions at home spending more time with
toys
instead
 of practising school work.
Additionally
, these
advertisements
 promote the risk of obesity in
children
. Meaning that more
children
 consume high-calorie snacks
hence
 tilting them towards obesity, in return, posing some of them health challenges at a tender age.
For instance
, a recent Medscape journal shows that several school-age
children
 with obesity challenges were found to be an outcome of poor diet habits
hence
 leading to even more deeming effects on the other aspect of their lives.
On the contrary
, some other
parents
 have a positive view of it. A cogent one is that
such
advertisements
 help several companies to make profits from their products.
That is
, it promotes their sales thereby making them amass a good financial reward. In 2019, the Coca-Cola company were able to make its highest yearly profit ever due to the level of social marking done.
Furthermore
, another set of
parents
 found
this
 as a good way to distract
children
 from crying and engage them at home. They found out that, not only that
children
 love toying, but it has
also
 been a way of engaging and preventing them from disturbing their
parents
 at home. On the Twitter app, many mothers aired their opinions on how they have successfully stopped their
children
 from crying through the use of
toys
. In conclusion, in my opinion, I think both views are valid depending on how each parent sees them. While its detrimental effects cannot be discarded, their values cannot be as well underplayed.
However
, parental decisions on which will be favourable to their
children
 will go a long way in the positive use of these
advertisements
.
Submitted by peteromisakin on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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