More and more people in the city live in homes with small spaces or no outdoor areas. Do you think it is a negative or positive development?

#people #city #homes #spaces #areas #development

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In recent years, the population

Wrong verb form

has been

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increasing day by day and more and more landmark buildings

are

Wrong verb form

have been

show examples

erected so many people have to live in houses without outdoors and no spaciousness. A hotly debated topic is whether

this

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is pessimistic or advantageous growth. From my point of view, I completely agree that

this

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brings many disadvantages that I mentioned in

this

Linking Words

essay. First and foremost, living in a home with a small space affects our physical development. In

another

Correct quantifier usage

other

show examples

way of saying,

children

Use synonyms

have no place to play and entertain themselves

while

Linking Words

their parents do not have time to take care of them.

As a result

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, they spend much time watching TV and playing games

instead

Linking Words

of physical activity.

In other words

Linking Words

, adults have to work all day in the office but

also

Linking Words

they lack space to exercise.

Therefore

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, their health is not good.

For instance

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, research by Hanoi National University in 2021 shows that 65% of

children

Use synonyms

and 80% of adults have poor bone health

due to

Linking Words

inactivity. Moving on to the next point, small space or no outdoors affects the people's spirit. It means that

children

Use synonyms

without a place to play will not be active and happy, and they easily get angry.

Additionally

Linking Words

, after working, adults do not relax to reduce stress. The result is poor emotions and

children

Use synonyms

not being fully developed. To jump to a conclusion, people who live in small spaces or without outdoors

such

Linking Words

as an apartment, and buildings,

… has

Wrong verb form

have

show examples

many disadvantages growth. They will be influenced both physically and mentally.

Submitted by trandung09091999 on Wed Dec 07 2022

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task response

The essay addresses the topic but lacks clear and relevant examples to support the points. The response is not complete and the ideas are somewhat clear but lack in depth.

coherence and cohesion

The essay is organized in a logical structure, but the introduction and conclusion are weak. The main points are supported but the examples lack relevance and specificity.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

258 words

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More and more people in the city live in homes with small spaces or no outdoor areas. Do you think it is a negative or positive development?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think most crimes are the result of circumstances like poverty and other social problems. Others believe that they are caused by people who are bad in nature. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

some people think that e should invent a new language for communication. It is a benefits of this outweigh the problems associated with it?

In some countries, criminal trials are shown on the television for the public. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

It is generally observed that almost all high level jobs are done by men. Does it mean that the government should encourage a certain percentage of these jobs to be reserved for women? Do you agree or disagree with this proposition.

topic as countries develop, more and more people buy and use their own cars. Do the advantages of this trend for individuals outweigh the disadvantages for the environment?