Nowadays, celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements, and this has set a bad example for young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#celebrities #glamour #wealth #achievements #people

these days actors and athletes are becoming role models for youngsters,for their lifestyle and to show off their achievements because ,wealth comes with most hard work ,without it nothing will get. henceforth

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strongly agree that by watching movies, or advertisements they are thinking that if they become famous

personality

Fix the agreement mistake

personalities

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they can earn so much money by playing a

role play

Add a hyphen

role-play

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instead

of doing their wone business ,but we can not assume that all

the

Correct article usage

apply

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youngsters are the same ,some are want becoming

athlete

Add an article

an athlete

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as it's him/her passion ,

towant

Correct your spelling

to want

bring the name to the country one thing is if one becomes a politician or athlete,

actor

Correct word choice

or actor

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,it gives recognition ,people identify where ever they go

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apply

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and

also

follows

Correct subject-verb agreement

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what they say suppose kids like to follow what their favourite person says they like to become the same suppose sachintendoolkar is favourite cricket player so most of the youth like to play the cricket ,PV Sindhu is famous tennis player ,nowadays kids

also

learning it and the no is increased than before, it's not all the time bad in some cases it happens ,it

also

depends on

person-to-person

Add an article

the person-to-person

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perception of how they receive,

such

cases it gives bad results in ,conclusion glamour world means for entertainment purposes it will be okay

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apply

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if we take into a personal life that will not work out ,we have to watch movies or sports for relaxation purposes,or sports should be considered as serious goals that give health as well as wealth to.

Submitted by karuna.mk220 on Wed Dec 07 2022

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Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

246 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

superficial attributes
sensationalism
idolize
materialism
philanthropy
glamour
achievements
role models
humanitarian
influence
media portrayal
public adoration
celebrity worship
young individuals
unrealistic standards
intellectual success
public interest
professional recognition

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Nowadays, celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements, and this has set a bad example for young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

People in the current generations are not fit and active. What are the problems. What can be done to encourage people to participate in sports activities.

In many cities, planners tend to arrange shops, schools, offices and houses in specific areas and separate them from each other. Do you think the advantages of this policy outweigh the disadvantages?

In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produces all over the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

In some countries, a few people earn extremely high salaries. Some people think that this is good for a country, while others believe that the government should control salaries and limit the amount people can earn. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

In some culture are often told they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. what are the advantages and more disadvantages of giving children these massages?