IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

People moving from farms to cities. However, it might cause disadvantages in cities and in farms

#people #farms #cities
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Now, In
this
Linking Words
 global era, It seems to be really true that
people
Use synonyms
 migrate from agricultural farms and lands to urban
cities
Use synonyms
.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, it would cause pros in
cities
Use synonyms
 and in farms due to congestion to reside in
cities
Use synonyms
. In
this
Linking Words
 manuscript, I would elucidate why
people
Use synonyms
 are switching to urban
areas
Use synonyms
 and provide a clear conclusion. To commence with, In
this
Linking Words
 current generation, showing rural
people
Use synonyms
 do pragmatically adapt the technology which is really helpful for them because they are struggling with lots of things
such
Linking Words
 as proper curriculum , hospitals etc.
For instance
Linking Words
, In many rural
areas
Use synonyms
, It is true that
people
Use synonyms
 could not have proper transport facilities and roads which is affecting the students who are all studying from the outskirts of their rural
areas
Use synonyms
 as well as farmers.
That is
Linking Words
 the reason
people
Use synonyms
 are relocating to developed
cities
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, they should have some disadvantages in
cities
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the cost of living and food is more expensive than farms which could have affected the rural
people
Use synonyms
 because rural
people
Use synonyms
 could never buy vegetables and fruits from outside they had taken the vegetables from their own agricultural lands.
Secondly
Linking Words
, homelessness and poverty are more common in
cities
Use synonyms
 and never talk to neighbours because they are electronically connected with advantaged technology.
Hence
Linking Words
, there are umpteen problems to reside in
cities
Use synonyms
. Understandably, many of the points above have stated that they have both positive and negative things about living in urban
areas
Use synonyms
. In my opinion, a rural area is the best one to live healthily because we could stay organically and healthily. So, the government should implement many things like transport,roads as well as education.
Submitted by zulaihaajmal on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: