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Band 4

In some parts of the world traditional festivals and celebrations have disappeared or are disappearing. What problems is this causing? What measures could be taken to counter this situation?

#parts #world #festivals #celebrations #measures #counter #situation
Festivals are
best
Correct article usage
the best
show examples
 ways to connect
people
 so that they can share cultures and societal
values
 which leads to peace and euphony. In current times, it is noted that
people
 are lacking their interest in these
get together
Join the words
get-together
show examples
 celebrations and festive events.
This
 essay will discuss
about
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
the reasons
due to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
which
Correct word choice
why
show examples
such
 things happen. In
this
 essay, I am
also
 going to give solutions that are needed to cope
up
Change preposition
apply
show examples
with
this
 situation. In
this
 fast pace world, we human beings are devoted to professional or personal living
circle
Fix the agreement mistake
circles
show examples
 that cuts off ourselves from social
gathering
Fix the agreement mistake
gatherings
show examples
such
 as traditional functions. Due to rapid urbanization as well as excess involvement with new things and technologies, individuals are detached from their tradition and
values
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 lead to a sharp decline in harmony among
neighbors
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neighbours
show examples
 and other members of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society.
For instance
, it has
seen
Add a missing verb
been seen
show examples
 that
people
 from rural areas move to cities for better job opportunities, but they leave their culture and ethics.
Therefore
this
 long detachment
with
Change preposition
from
show examples
 family and society results in
Correct your spelling
disappearing
disapperaing
Correct article usage
the disapperaing
show examples
 of traditional festivals. As we all know,
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
making a living is essential for any human being, but it is still required to carry on with our
values
 and ethics. We can adopt various methods to continue celebrating various festivals the way they are celebrated by our parents or grandparents
such
 as we can organize functions in our apartment building to spread the customary festive means. Like in the ongoing Football World Cup Qatar has brilliantly displayed its
Correct your spelling
culture
cuture
Correct your spelling
culture
 to the world
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
also
 helps them to connect more with their own
people
. We need to take
such
 steps to build
strong
Correct article usage
a strong
show examples
bong
Correct your spelling
bond
show examples
 between our lives and tradition. To wrap up,
i
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I
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 want to add that there is
need
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a need
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 for us to get in touch with our ethics and
values
 so that we can deliver
these ethic ideology
Change the determiner
this ethic ideology
these ethic ideologies
show examples
 to
our
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
future generations so that they can
also
 learn to live in peace and harmony.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • traditional festivals
  • heritage
  • cultural identity
  • folklore
  • cultural tourism
  • intergenerational
  • homogenization
  • commercialization
  • intangible cultural heritage
  • community engagement
  • awareness
  • revitalize
  • cultural diversity
  • educational programs
  • governmental support
  • logistical support
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