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Band 4.5

overpopulation of urban areas has led to numerous problems. Identify one or two serious ones and suggest ways that government and individuals can tackle these problems

#overpopulation #areas #two #ones #government #individuals
There is no denying the fact that the main reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 many problems in the cities is
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
overpopulation.
This
 essay will discuss some of the major challenges caused by
this
 phenomenon, and
then
 try to suggest some solutions.
First
 of all, after rural immigration, the
number
 of citizens in urban areas is exponentially increasing, which creates so many problems for the people living there, in the
first
 degree we find the degradation of life’s facilities and necessities,
such
 as hospitalisation, education, entertainment …etc. to illustrate, depend on latest statistics, the
number
 of students in Morocco rises from 24 per classroom to 40 which influence negatively the quality of learning, and
that is
 a real problem for the country.
Second
 of all, one of the most nightmares
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 urban is the huge
number
 of crimes especially in some neighbourhoods, on the top of the list we find stolen, which has one common reason,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 is poverty due to the
number
 of people who could not find jobs because of the overpopulation.
Finally
, the problem is more complicated than it seems, which is why we need to react immediately. On one
hand
Add a comma
,hand
show examples
 the government,
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
needs to create more opportunities for work.
In addition
, the services must be improved to respond to the citizen’s needs. On other hand, people should be more aware of these issues. To conclude, there is no escape from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
overpopulation which is caused by many factors, and that produces important problems in cities.
However
, some serious decisions must be taken by either government
and
Correct word choice
or
show examples
 individuals.
Submitted by Ltif.mariem on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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