Some people believe that employment over the age of 60 is not right and creates lots of problems. So people should retire after 60 and not work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #employment #age #right #lots #work

It is generally true that humans ask to retire when they are over 60 years old nowadays. Some people believe that human beings' brain functions would become worse when over a certain age.

Moreover

, it is not the correct way to let elders keep working because they may make up some troubles.

However

, some argue that everyone is different.

In other words

, some workers still have good qualities for completing the jobs.

Therefore

, it would not the reason for people to leave working places. in

this

essay, I will discuss both views and present my perspectives. One of the major reasons over 60-year-old employees ought not to have a job is because their bodies are not healthier than before. Not only physical health but

also

mental health is becoming weaker.

This

is because animals have their own deadlines;

therefore

, when features get older, the organs would easily be sick. The memory and creations would show a downward trend. In according, some elders

also

say that they often feel tired and forget things.

Hence

, crowd debate that companies should not apply those workers who are over 60 years old.

On the other hand

, some folk say that making issues is not only because of age. Governments can not ask people to be retired at the same age. Some public is still clearly thinking even though they are not young.

In addition

, if employees do not have a job, they would lose their income and need the nation's help. The government have to provide welfare to those residents.

Therefore

, I think everyone should have their own decisions about when is the time not to work. Needing to consider own situations. To sum up,

although

elders are likely to be troublemakers, they have their own options for deciding their retirement moment.

Thus

, I disagree with the topic that governments can not demand citizens not

Fix the infinitive

apply

show examples

work.

Submitted by chaowen731 on Sun Dec 11 2022

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Fully explain your ideas

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

313 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that employment over the age of 60 is not right and creates lots of problems. So people should retire after 60 and not work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In some countries young people move in their own homes in early twenties, in other countries they live with parents longer. What do you think, do the advantages of living alone outweigh the disadvantages?

Many people like to wear fashionable clothes. Why do you think is the case? Is this a good or a bad thing?

Although the prices of fuels have greatly increased over the last decade or two, it is argued that further increases in fuel prices are the only way to reduce world consumption of fuel and lessen pressure on the world’s fuel resources. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In many countries students are engaged in some sort of paid work . Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibilities. What is your opinion?