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Band 7.5

Some people say that sport is very important for a nation's development, while others believe that sport is no more than a leisure time activity. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #sport #nation #development #leisure #time #activity
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Nowadays, some
people
Use synonyms
 believe that playing
sports
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 is incredibly crucial for a country’s development, others argue that sport is not that important and it is just activity in leisure time. In my personal ,view I completely believe the
first
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 view, and in
this
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essay
Add a comma
,essay
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 I will explain why and draw my own conclusion.
First
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 of all, in terms of the benefits points of
sports
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 for a nation’s development.
Initially
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, the community who know how
sports
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 are critical for the human body and mind are more advanced in life. The reason behind
this
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 is that doing exercise regularly assists to keep fit and helps to think correctly.
For example
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, many researchers from Oxford University found that the individuals who used to go to the gym every day are more effective and successful in their job and they have healthy relationships with their family and their friends.
Moreover
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, the countries that encouraged
sports
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 and provide facilities for free to the citizens will definitely gain a lot of benefits.
Firstly
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,
people
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 will be more active to improve their country.
This
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 is because a healthy body will affect their mind and the way they think.
For instance
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, rich
people
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 who have a business
such
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 as companies and organizations know how
sports
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 are vital and they are likely to
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
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exercise five days per week.
Furthermore
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, the concept of
sports
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 is not just important for human health it is
also
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 important to have a smart and intelligent community. In conclusion,
although
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 some
people
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 play
sports
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 just in their free time. I believe that the success of the countries relies on individuals who have healthy bodies and minds.
Submitted by Noufalbahouth5 on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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