A large company in your area has decided to spend a certain amount of money, either to sponsor a local children's sports team for two years, or to pay for two open-air concerts. It has asked for feedback from the general public. Write a letter to the company. In your letter, describe the benefits of sponsoring the sports team, summarise the benefits of paying for the concerts, say how you think the company should spend the money.

#company #area #amount #money #sponsor #children #sports #team #two #years #concerts #feedback #summarise

Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing

this

letter with regard to giving the feedback to you which you want from the general public to choose from either to sponsor a local children's

sports

team

for two years or to pay for two open-air concerts. The merits of providing financial support to

sports

teams will help to boost the

sports

spirit of each player in the

team

. Apart from that, the coach will be having enough amount of money to buy any new equipment needed for the player and because of

this

players of the

team

might play in the country's

team

in future.

Consequently

, there are benefits too of paying for the concerts

such

as people will get entertainment by watching stage performances. Apart from that, people would have a great chance to socialize with numerous

persons

Replace the word

people

show examples

Moreover

, individuals can

also

try various types of cuisines from different stalls present at the concert. I think your company should spend the money on local children's

sports

teams owing to the fact that it can be beneficial for the nation. Some players might play in the Olympics to represent the country. Looking forward to a positive and prompt response. Yours sincerely, Shah Harshil

Submitted by harshil31099 on Tue Dec 13 2022

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

7 paragraphs

202 words

7.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Young people who commit serious crimes should be punished in the same way as adults. To want extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people claim that not enough of the waste from homes is recycled. They say that the only way to increase recycling is for governments to make it a legal requirement. To what extent do you think laws are needed to make people recycle more of their waste?

Some people believe these days teenagers are spending their leisure time at shopping centers instead of doing organized activities as sports or music . Do you think it has a negative or positive development?