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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Parents should control children behaviour but some says they shouldnot be controlled. Write both the viewes and give you opinion.

#parents #control #children #behaviour #shouldnot #viewes
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In recent days,
children
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's attitudes are becoming harder to control because of their affection for technology. Some people have given out their opinion that
parents
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 should educate their child to have better
behaviour
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, but others said their personality should not be in charge.
This
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 essay will discuss both points of view,
also
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 my opinion and I will explain it. To start with, youngsters' personalities are unique, it is affected by the environment around them, especially their own family and school.
Parents
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 act an important role in the mission of educating their
children
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 and affecting their
behaviour
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 the most. If the father and mother of a kid do not teach their child to be a gentle person and correct their bad habit, later in the future their might grow up as a menace to society and their life would be ruined by their
behaviour
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. To avoid and stop a chance of
children
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's
behaviour
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 that would lead to a crime,
parents
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 should restrict kids' bad habits and time on the internet and interact with them more frequently.
For instance
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,
instead
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 of giving your child a tablet or a smartphone to entertain, you should give them a book or have a chat with them like a friend, it has multiple benefits like developing
children
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's communication skills and keeping them away from harmful content on social media that may affect their
behaviour
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 in a negative way.
On the other hand
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,
parents
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also
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 should let their kids explore the world by themself, that would improve their independence and their own personality.
In addition
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, they gain knowledge and experience from their mistakes,
children
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 would understand that their inappropriate
behaviour
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 should be fixed if they want to be better people and correct their own attitudes.
Also
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, youngsters would be more creative and smarter when they are free to discover society and develop the attitude that attracts and is appropriate for people around them. But if the kids do not understand and realise that bad
behaviour
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 would make their life more struggle and
parents
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 do not mention it, the result for it would be unexpected, mostly turning the kid into a bad guy In consequence, I think both opinions have their own benefits,
parents
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 should balance between controlling
children
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's
behaviour
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 and letting them build up their own personalities.
Submitted by tridung270205 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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