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Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time. This can benefit teenagers and the community as well. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

#people #teenagers #community #work #time #benefit
Some people think that
teenagers
 should do
community
work
 which is unpaid in their free time is a good way to give the
community
 some benefits.
Furthermore
Add a comma
,
show examples
the
teenagers
 will obtain many experiences in communication with others and doing new things. The majority of
teenagers
 need to know how to communicate with others in the best way and how to do many things.
Firstly
, when some
teenagers
 volunteer to clear
park
Fix the agreement mistake
parks
show examples
, streets or beaches, they will feel happy.
Therefore
, they will clean their rooms to get happiness.
Secondly
, many
teenagers
 should do basic
work
 without getting
money
 to
can
Verb problem
apply
show examples
be independent in the future.
For example
, when some
teenagers
 cook at a restaurant, they will obtain
much
Fix the agreement mistake
apply
show examples
information about cooking
that is
 good for them in the next few days.
Finally
,
usually
Add a comma
usually,
show examples
 many people want
money
 to
work
, but when
teenagers
 do not get any
money
 for their
work
, they will normally do something unpaid. On another hand, the
community
 receives benefits as well from unpaid
work
, so people and
teenagers
 who have free time have to do something for their
community
 to improve the pleasure between others.
Furthermore
, unpaid
working
Replace the word
work
show examples
increase
Change the verb form
increases
show examples
 the relationship in the
community
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 will
rise
Verb problem
increase
show examples
cooperation and the improvement in their life. In conclusion, there are many opinions about unpaid
work
 by
teenagers
 who have free time, but in my opinion, I
concert
Verb problem
agree
show examples
 with working without getting
money
 since it is important to improve living.
Submitted by hassan.alalia on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • required
  • unpaid
  • community work
  • benefit
  • teenagers
  • life skills
  • volunteering
  • empathy
  • compassion
  • socially aware
  • responsible
  • interact
  • diverse backgrounds
  • cultural understanding
  • tolerance
  • work experience
  • essential skills
  • employment
  • interests
  • passions
  • career development
  • contribute
  • betterment
  • development
  • local community
  • mental well-being
  • stress
  • self-esteem
  • burden
  • academic
  • personal lives
  • time management
  • support
  • balance
  • participate
  • encouraged
  • numerous benefits
  • individuals
  • conclusion
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