Some people say that the government should stop TV and Newspaper from showing crimes because media coverage of violent crimes is frightening people and encouraging criminals. Do you agree or disagree with the statement?

#people #government #tv #newspaper #crimes #media #coverage #criminals

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In the present day, with the development of technology, we have been offered several means like TV, the internet,

magazine

Fix the agreement mistake

magazines

show examples

and

newspaper

Fix the agreement mistake

newspapers

show examples

to update us about information worldwide.

And having broadcasted

Verb problem

Broadcasted

show examples

the breach scenes is a controversial topic as the violence can be frightening to viewers or

promoting

Verb problem

encourage

show examples

people to commit crimes. I'm inclined to agree with the mentioned opinion as there is another perspective. I will discuss both opinions in the essay with suitable examples. On the

first

Correct word choice

other

show examples

hand, human psychology is vulnerable to the brutality shown in programs.

To begin

with, violence often frightens the viewers and affects their peace of mind.

For example

, the elderly feel depressed and scared after watching an episode of a story containing murder and robbery.

In addition

, If the criminal

have

Wrong verb form

had

show examples

read the detailed description from the newspaper, they would have known the idea to execute a crime by the local authorities.

Therefore

, the government should impose a restriction

to broadcast

Change preposition

on broadcasting

show examples

such

brutal acts.

On the other hand

, some people believe that a clear, informative message is delivered to the young generation through these criminal reports. The horrifying consequences of wrongdoings remind them of not being involved in any offence

such

as drug abuse, or alcohol abuse.

Moreover

, many cases broadcasted on TV have been explained in crime coverage, which allows viewers to know more about the criminal. Through

this

, they can protect themselves

as well as

their

beloved

Correct your spelling

loved

show examples

ones. In conclusion, the violence presented through any mass media has both positive and negative influences on society. From my point of view, the prohibition on

such

media coverage does not serve the purpose, though some filters can be applied to make it more effective for people absorbing the information.

Submitted by tdmp1208 on Thu Dec 15 2022

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task response

Address the opposing view in more detail to provide a more balanced argument.

coherence and cohesion

Develop stronger connections between ideas and focus on the logical progression of thoughts within paragraphs and across the essay.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

287 words

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