With the improvements in today’s health care, society has to care for more and more elderly people. Do you feel that society will be able to cope with the increase in numbers of elderly people today and how can it be managed? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Nowadays, there are more and more elderly
people
who need medical management due to the development of the health
Correct your spelling
healthcare
care
system. In my opinion, society has difficulties dealing with a number of elderly people
. This
is because the healthcare industry face
loss of employment and Change the verb form
faces
the
tough situation in the workplace.
In the beginning, healthcare industries are struggling with recruiting and Correct article usage
a
remaining
workers these days. In terms of recruiting, it is believed that healthcare production is so tough to work in. Correct your spelling
retaining
This
negative influence affects young generations not to join this
business. Also
, this
production is in a difficult situation for the remaining employees
. In general, many women are working for caring for senior citizens. Thus
, if they get to rest for taking care
of babies, so many women would quit their jobs. It is hard for the health
Correct your spelling
healthcare
care
industry to recruit and maintain employees
.
Moreover
, there are so many duties which
Correct word choice
that
employees
are unable to handle in the workplace. Generally, one person has to take care
of some elderly people
, but they need to finish many duties in a day. For instance
, elderly people
need to eat three meals for
breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Change preposition
apply
Moreover
, they need some help with taking showers and using toilets
. As it is clear, Correct article usage
the toilets
employees
should do anything around them.
In conclusion, so many elderly people
has
to be taken Change the verb form
have
care
of in this
society because today's health care
improves rapidly. In that situation, it is hard to handle these
increased Correct determiner usage
this
elderly
Correct quantifier usage
number of elderly
people
due to the fact that there are few workers and many duties.Submitted by daichi.n.001125 on
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite