You have a suggestion for a park nearby where you live. Write a letter to your city’s council. In your letter include: • what your suggestion is • why you think this suggestion will improve the park • when you would like to see this suggestion in action

#suggestion #park #city’s #council #action

Dear sir /madam, I am writing to provide some

suggestions

for a

park

which is located in Kowloon city . I would like to talk about some problems

first

. There

Change the verb form

are

show examples

not enough

rubbish

bins in the

park

and cleaners are not always stand by there . Some people do have any public morality and they are

through out

Correct your spelling

throughout

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

rubbish

anywhere. That makes the

park

dirty. Here are some

suggestions

First

established

Wrong verb form

establishing

show examples

rubbish

bins is one of the

suggestions

. Maybe every 10miles can establish a

rubbish

bin and set up a banner which included

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the cleaning knowledge for citizens.How is

Correct pronoun usage

it to

show examples

Remove the article

apply

show examples

good

citizenship

Replace the word

citizen

show examples

Change the punctuation

show examples

After establishing those

rubbish

bins and through

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

banner advertising or education

the

Change preposition

of the

show examples

citizens, most of them will understand the responsibilities in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society.That's important for us. I think that these

suggestions

can be done it as fast as possible. It is because the Xmas holiday will

be come

Change to the active voice

come

have come

show examples

soon. Most people will go to that

park

in the holiday . If the problem

is not improve

Change the verb form

is not improved

is not improving

show examples

before the holiday , the situation will be getting worse after

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

Xmas.

Therefore

, hope

Correct article usage

the city'council

show examples

city'council

Correct your spelling

city council

will accept my

opions

Correct your spelling

options

opinions

. Yours faithfully, Kathy

Submitted by sonson on Fri Dec 16 2022

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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2Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

202 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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You have a suggestion for a park nearby where you live. Write a letter to your city’s council. In your letter include: • what your suggestion is • why you think this suggestion will improve the park • when you would like to see this suggestion in action

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

To achieve personal happiness, the relationships we have with other people (friends, colleagues, family) are more essential than every other thing. Issues like wealth and occupations take the second place. Write to support this claim.

Children of ages 7-11 now spend more time watching television and/or playing video games than before. What are the effects of this on children, family and society? What are the possible solutions to this situation

Many people nowadays travel abroad for their university education. Why do people do this? Would you consider doing this yourself and why? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.