It is important for people to take risks, both their professional and their personal lives. Do you think advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages

Nowadays young generations
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
mostly like to take risks, both
their
Change preposition
in their
show examples
professionals
Fix the agreement mistake
professional
show examples
and their personal lives. It affects
people
in many ways. In my opinion, I
beleive
Correct your spelling
believe
that the of taking
risk
Fix the agreement mistake
risks
show examples
outweigh the drawbacks.
However
, In
this
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
will explore both aspects and
finaly
Correct your spelling
finally
give my own opinion. On the
one
hand, critics may
pointout
Correct your spelling
point out
that,
one
of the significant drawbacks of taking
risk
Fix the agreement mistake
risks
show examples
is
Correct determiner usage
that
show examples
the
Correct your spelling
that
show examples
people
losts
Correct your spelling
lost
their things easily.
For example
, there is a
people
, who work
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
very
Add an article
a very
show examples
stressful
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
. But he got
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
salary from that
job
. But he found another
job
in another company.
This
company promised him
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
gave
Change the form of the verb
give
show examples
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
salary and
less
Correct quantifier usage
fewer
show examples
working hours. So he moved from that
job
. But
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
time later the company was closed. He losted hos
job
even. If he did not
moved
Change the verb form
move
show examples
his
job
he does not want to face
this
situation.
Futhermore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
young
peopke
Correct your spelling
people
like to play
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
game
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
money
. So sometimes they spent
lot
Change the article
a lot
show examples
of
money
from
Change preposition
on
show examples
those
game
Fix the agreement mistake
games
show examples
.
Then
lost their
money
a
Change preposition
for a
show examples
little amount
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
time.
Such
as
Casino
Fix the agreement mistake
Casinos
show examples
, bet for the games. Sometimes it affects
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
's mental stress.
On the other hand
, there are
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
of arguments
favour
Change preposition
in favour
show examples
of my stance.
One
of the most preponderant
one
Change to a plural noun
ones
show examples
is that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
some
Change preposition
in some
show examples
moments
people
can
got
Change the verb form
get
show examples
more benefits for
stance
Correct pronoun usage
their stance
show examples
.
People
who won a lottery ticket. So he has a lot of
money
. So he can invest that
money
as a fixed deposit in the bank
either
Correct word choice
and
show examples
he can buy properties or gold.
Therefore
he can save that
money
.
Moreover
tha
Correct your spelling
the
value of those
money
oncrease
Correct your spelling
increase
woth
Correct your spelling
with
time.
Ot
Correct your spelling
It
At
is
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
Add the particle
to invest
show examples
invest
Replace the word
investment
show examples
for his future. Taking
risk
affect
Add the particle
to affect
show examples
people
in various ways. Sometimes
ot
Correct your spelling
it
has good
concequences
Correct your spelling
consequences
and sometimes bad
concequences
Correct your spelling
consequences
.
However
, in
argument
Correct article usage
the argument
show examples
outlined above,
one
can conclude that despite having some drawbacks the benefits of taking
risk
Fix the agreement mistake
risks
show examples
had more positive
concequinces
Correct your spelling
consequences
consequence
in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society.
Submitted by harshijayalath97 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Opportunities
  • Growth
  • Innovation
  • Challenges
  • Self-discovery
  • Resilience
  • Uncertainty
  • Consequences
  • Calculated risks
  • Stagnation
  • Regret
  • Comfort zone
  • Entrepreneurship
  • Adventurous spirit
  • Thriving
  • Failure
  • Mitigate
  • Reap the rewards
What to do next:
Look at other essays: