You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic. There are several factors that motivate people to stay in the workforce, and money is the most important reason/factor. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

#minutes** #topic #**there #factors #people #workforce #money #reason #factor #**at

Currently, most

people

need to earn their lives by working.

Although

money

is a crucial term when

people

compare their offers, it

is disagreed

Change to the active voice

disagrees

has disagreed

show examples

that

money

is the most important factor to stimulate

people

to stay in their workforce. Analyzing the common reasons why

people

resign, like the lack of

the

Correct article usage

show examples

sense

of accomplishment and unbearable working load, can prove

this

First

people

can

left

Change the verb form

leave

be left

show examples

well paid

Add a hyphen

well-paid

show examples

job

bacause

Correct your spelling

because

they can not feel

sufficient

Add an article

a sufficient

show examples

sense

of accomplishment. It is widely admitted that everyone wants to be respected by others as well as themselves. Taking up a

lot

Add the preposition

oflot

show examples

time, working functions as the main source of self-respect.

As a result

, if employees’ decisions and work outputs do not

receice

Correct your spelling

receive

corresponding appreciation from their colleagues or even leaders, they will be likely to resign. It is a case that

woney

Correct your spelling

money

is not as important as the

sense

of accomplishment.

Second

people

can resign from a decent job because the job is

beyong

Correct your spelling

beyond

their energy. Compare to machines which can work for 7*24 hours,

Change preposition

apply

show examples

mankind,

people

need to rest for enough time. There are many jobs calculating salaries by working time where employees can increase their income amount only by working for more hours

everyday

Replace the word

every day

show examples

, but few

does

Change the verb form

show examples

so in reality

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

because most

people

want to balance

between

Change preposition

apply

show examples

life and work. It is a case that

woney

Correct your spelling

money

is not as vital as work-life balance. To conclude,

money

are

Change the verb form

show examples

not as important as other factors to some extent, like the

sense

of completement and work-life balance.

Therefore

money

is not the most important reason/factor to motivate

people

to stay in their workforce.

Submitted by cn.zhixiang on Sat Dec 17 2022

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

270 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Social networking sites are beneficial on an individual level, but for a community as a whole, it does have a negative impact. Give your opinion.

some people think that schools should focus on academic subjects like algebra, history, and physics, but others think that schools should spent time focusing on practical skills like time management and banking. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In many cities today, most people live in large apartment blocks. Does this kind of accommodation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Money spent on space exploration is a complete waste. Governments could better spend this money on other things to benefit the nation. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that public buildings should be moved out ò the city to promote citizen's well-being and better economic growing, while some argue that the planning will cause more harm than good. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.