Friends have more impact on the academic performance of students than their teachers do. Do you agree or disagree? Use details and examples to support your opinion.

First
of all, I strongly believe that
friends
have more
influence
on the academic performance of
students
than their
teachers
do.
This
is because
students
spend more time at school with
friends
. Throughout school life, colleagues hang out and talk with their
friends
.
This
could potentially
influence
the time spent on their studies. In some
friend
groups
, helping each other by solving math problems together is common.
On the contrary
, in some other
friend
groups
,
students
end up
chit chatting
Add a hyphen
chit-chatting
show examples
due to distractions.
Thus
, I think that
friends
have more
influence
on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
school grades than
teachers
do.
Secondly
, there was a scientifically proven study that conversations with companions could have both positive and negative impacts on educational achievements. In
this
study,
friend
groups
that talked about global occurrences and news showed high grades in their reports.
In contrast
, other
friend
groups
that talked about social media and animals were not able to represent great appraisal. There could be a positive impact on
students
’ assessments in social studies since
friends
are capable of broadening
students
’ horizons and
ways
Correct article usage
the ways
show examples
they perceive
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
modern society.
Although
some people argue that
teachers
are the most vital factor in enhancing
students
’ academic performance; I suppose that
teachers
do not have as much
influence
as their companions.
This
is because even if there are amazing
teachers
, revisions and outside
learnings
Fix the agreement mistake
learning
show examples
are more essential.
Students
attain upstanding grades since they
prepared
Add a missing verb
are prepared
show examples
enough in tackling challenging questions during examinations.
Students
are ready for tests because they have completed a lot of past papers. What
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
more,
students
Change noun form
students'
student's
show examples
classmates affect
students
more because they are able to stimulate each others’ motivations and how much effort they put in
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples
Submitted by dokmally2 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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